Tag Archives: Personal growth

Walls, Giants & Grasshoppers. The Lies That Hold Us Back.

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“When you grow up, you tend to get told that the world is the way it is and your life is just to live your life inside the world, try not to bash into the walls too much, try to have a nice family, have fun, save a little money. That’s a very limited life. Life can be much broader, once you discover one simple fact, and that is that everything around you that you call life was made up by people that were no smarter than you. And you can change it, you can influence it, you can build your own things that other people can use. Once you learn that, you’ll never be the same again.

“The minute that you understand that you can poke life and actually something will, you know if you push in, something will pop out the other side, that you can change it, you can mold it. That’s maybe the most important thing. It’s to shake off this erroneous notion that life is there and you’re just gonna live in it, versus embrace it, change it, improve it, make your mark upon it.

“I think that’s very important and however you learn that, once you learn it, you’ll want to change life and make it better, cause it’s kind of messed up, in a lot of ways. Once you learn that, you’ll never be the same again.”   — Steve Jobs

I love this quote.  I find it very inspiring.  The truth is though, I was that guy.  I was living “inside” the life that I had, trying not to bump into the walls.  Not realizing that I had any control, that I could change things and make them happen instead of just letting them happen and responding to them.

K2 remove the limits

It reminds me of the verse in Acts 27 when during Paul’s voyage to Rome, the ship owner and the captain ignored Paul’s warning that they should not loose from the Fair Havens of Lasea, but instead launched out with a soft wind.  Not long after they were out at sea, they ran right into a typhoon.  When the winds were so strong that the ship wouldn’t respond to any attempt to steer it, the just turned it over to the wind.

And when the south wind blew softly, supposing that they had obtained their purpose, they weighed anchor and sailed along Crete, close in shore.  But after no long time there beat down from it a tempestuous wind, which is called Euraquilo: and when the ship was caught, and could not face the wind, we gave way to it, and were driven. – Act 27:13-15 

We gave way to it, and were driven!  If you continue reading they got to the point where they literally did not know where they were.  They were lost.  That’s what I did for many years, and I see people everywhere doing that with their lives today.  The truth is that God has a VERY, VERY BIG plan for your live.  It’s a life that Ephesians 2:10 says that God hand crafted you to live, and that it’s been waiting for you. It was “before ordained that you should walk in it”.  It’s a good life.  It’s the very best, and most fulfilling life you could possibly live.  We see from Ephesians 3:14-21 that part of our problem is that we have trouble comprehending the extent of the love that God has for us.  He wants us to know that He is able to do Exceeding Abundantly Above all that we ask or think when we allow Him to work in us.  The short of it is this…God wants to help us but we have a vision problem.

The sad truth is that God is not limited by His ability to help us, He’s limited by our ability to receive His help.  We are the limiting factor in whether or not God can move in our lives.  We receive by faith and faith is of the heart.  Our heart problems limit God in our lives.

We don’t see ourselves the way God sees us.  Consider this.  Remember the story in the Bible about when Moses sent the 12 spies into the promised land to spy it out?  They went into the promised land and surveyed it for 40 days.  They said:

“We went to the land where you sent us. It is a land filled with many good things! Here is some of the fruit that grows there. But the people living there are very powerful. The cities are very large and strongly defended. We even saw some Anakites there (Giants). Caleb told the people near Moses to be quiet. Then Caleb said, “We should go up and take that land for ourselves. We can easily take that land.” But the men who had gone with him said, “We cannot fight those people! They are much stronger than we are.” So those men gave a report that discouraged the people. They said, “The land we saw is full of strong people. They are strong enough to easily defeat anyone who goes there. We saw the giant Nephilim people there! (The descendants of Anak come from the Nephilim.) We felt like little grasshoppers. Yes, we were like grasshoppers to them!”   Num 13:27-33 ERV

Are you hearing that? Was what they said true?  For the last 400 years, someone else had designed their lives. Someone else who didn’t care about them but only wanted to use them and exploit them for their labor. God had led them into the wilderness for about two years at this point.  The Bible says that He did it to prove them.  Now God Almighty has led them right up to the land that He promised them and it’s finally here…It’s Go Time!  Time to believe God’s Word and move into the “Exceedingly Good Land”.  So – Was what they said true?  No!  and to prove it, 40 years later their children took the land!  After 40 years, the inhabitants of the land were the same, the walled cities were the same and the giants were still there.  But 40 years later all those things didn’t matter because the people believed God’s promise and didn’t allow the circumstances to stop them from moving forward.  They refused the limits and the lies. They proved it could be done.  The Grasshopper vision was gone!  God’s plan for them was soooo much more than anything they could have done for themselves.  It truly was Exceeding Abundantly Above all they could ask or think.

Jeff Goins writes in his book “The Art of Work” about the unlived life.  He writes about allowing yourself to become who you are supposed to be in order to be able to do what you are supposed to do.  So, I ask you today, there, looking down at my writing from your glowing screen.  Are you ready?  Are you ready to accept God’s call to you to live the life you were born to live?  Are you ready for the Exceeding Abundantly Above path for your life? Are you following your path and making your life happen instead of just “giving way to it and being driven”?

This is a prayer that Paul the Apostle prayed for the Colossian church.  It is a Holy Spirit inspired prayer.  I ask you to pray this over yourself every day.  Believe it knowing that God wants to do it in your life.

“Since the day we heard these things about you, we have continued praying for you. This is what we pray:

that God will make you completely sure of what he wants by giving you all the wisdom and spiritual understanding you need; 

that this will help you live in a way that brings honor to the Lord and pleases him in every way; that your life will produce good works of every kind and that you will grow in your knowledge of God; 

that God will strengthen you with his own great power, so that you will be patient and not give up when troubles come. Then you will be happy”   Col 1:9-11 ERV

 If you not sure about your relationship with God and you’re not sure of His willingness to help you, Please Click here.

Part 2 – Want To Give Up? Here’s What To Do Instead.

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So how do we maintain our focus?

When we look at what God said to Joshua, we can see that the first thing that God told him to do was to get focused and to get obstinate about keeping focused. Then God told him where to focus. In Joshua 1:8 God told him “This book of the law shall not depart out of your mouth; but you shall meditate in it day and night, that you may observe to do according to all that is written therein: For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you shall have good success.”

brass loop focus

Pay close attention to the details here. Here we can see the key to renewing our mind as scripture instructs us in Romans 12:1 & 2. Here God’s promise is that we can make our way prosperous and have good success. There (Rom 12:2) the promise is that we can PROVE the good, acceptable & perfect will of God.

We really need to notice here that God is not just instructing him to read it continually. Joshua was instructed to SAY IT continually. “This book of the law shall not depart out of your mouth…” Rev. Mark Hankins said in quoting Kenneth E. Hagin that confession opens the door to the supernatural. Very often people will hear the truth and say “I believe that”. Mark Hankins said “it’s not enough to believe it! You’ve got to declare it if you want circumstances in your life to change”.

Remember in a previous post I talked about Deuteronomy 6:6-9 where the Lord commanded the Children of Israel.

(ISV)”Let these words that I’m commanding you today be always on your heart. 7 Teach them repeatedly to your children. Talk about them while sitting in your house or walking on the road, and as you lie down or get up. 8 Tie them as reminders on your forearm, bind them on your forehead, 9 and write them on the door frames of your house and on your gates.”

The truth that I keep driving at with this passage is it has to be in our mouth and it has to be repeatedly. It is the constant exposure to the Word of God that brings faith in God, and specific exposure brings faith in God for specific things. A good personal example would be that I thank God every day for bringing Col 1:9-11 to pass in my life and in the lives of my family.

Col 1:9 For this reason, since the day we heard about this, we have not stopped praying for you and asking that you may be filled with the full knowledge of God’s will with respect to all spiritual wisdom and understanding, 10 so that you might live in a manner worthy of the Lord and be fully pleasing to him as you bear fruit while doing all kinds of good things and growing in the full knowledge of God. 11 You are being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might, so that you might patiently endure everything with joy. (ISV).

We can actually pray this for the entire church and I sometimes do, but I pray this in first person, over myself continually, thanking God for making it true concerning me. Very specific promise for very specific faith. When we intentionally expose ourselves to the promises in God’s Word, we are allowing the Holy Spirit to guide us into all the truth (Jn 16:13) and to make the Word real to us.

In Matthew 16 Jesus asked His disciples who people were saying he was. They gave various answers but He then asked them who they (the disciples) say He was.  Simon said “You are the Christ. Son of the living God”. Jesus said “Blessed art thou, Simon Bar-Jonah: for flesh and blood hath not revealed it unto thee, but my Father who is in heaven. 18 And I also say unto thee, that thou art Peter, and upon this rock I will build my church; and the gates of Hades shall not prevail against it. 19 I will give unto thee the keys of the kingdom of heaven: and whatsoever thou shalt bind on earth shall be bound in heaven; and whatsoever thou shalt loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.” (ASV).

I left this in the American Standard Version because it says something specific that many of the paraphrase versions change. Jesus said that Simon was made firm and solid (Petros – [piece of] rock) by the understanding of the revelation from God that Jesus was the Christ, the son of the living God. Then Jesus goes on to say that on the (Petra – [mass of] rock), the revelation that He was the Christ, the son of the living God,  He was going to build His church. He then says that the Gates of Hades shall not prevail against it. Against what? Against that revelation. Jesus then says that he was giving the church the keys to the kingdom of Heaven and the right to bind and loose that would affect both earth and Heaven.  He gave His church the power to lock and unlock gates!

So lets put last week and this week together and summarize –

When your dream is being challenged, you are discouraged and close to giving up:

  1. Be strong and of a good courage. Remember, the Hebrew word translated Be Strong is “To fasten, fortify, strengthen”, and the definition of the word used here for Courage means “To be alert, steadfastly minded, obstinate”. Again, we can see that God was encouraging Joshua to become laser focused on the promise and to protect that focus.
  2. Meditate on the promises of God’s Word. Meditate is not just something you do with your mind. Meditate according to scripture is something you do with your mouth. It’s outlined in Deuteronomy 6:6-9 and in Joshua 1:8. This is where we learn what our focus should be.
  3. Stay in the Word until the Holy Spirit turns the light on. It’s when He brings light that real faith comes. Allow Him to make it real to you. It’s when this happens that you become solid and immovable concerning your focus. This is also where the keys come into play. When The Lord reveals your answer to what you’ve been praying for from the Word, then you now have a key that unlocks the gates of Hades. A locked gate can’t prevail against the key. You now have the God given power and wisdom to remove the bars that have been holding you back. Now is the time to open your mouth! Remember, Jesus said in Mark 11:23 “Verily I say unto you, Whosoever shall say unto this mountain, Be thou taken up and cast into the sea; and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that what he saith cometh to pass; he shall have it” (ASV). While believing is important, it needs to be mixed with saying.

Lets take a minute and put this into practice. Make this something you declare everyday for yourself.

Lord, I am your workmanship. I was created in Christ Jesus for a good work and you planned this work before the world was formed (Eph 2:10). I stand on your promise that you will guide me into all the truth, and so I know that you are leading me today. I thank you for it. I am so glad that you have created me with divine purpose and I have significance in the earth and my life has meaning. I commit myself to be available to be used to the utmost today and everyday. I will accomplish great things as I obey your plan for me. Thank you Lord for your love for me, your care for me and for the blood of Jesus that was shed so that I can enjoy this relationship with you. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

Want To Give Up? Here’s What To Do Instead.

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While the argument can be made that we need adversity and challenge to live a fulfilled life, all of us have faced situations where it just seemed like the dream that God gave us would never come true. For some unseen reason, our heart’s desire was repeatedly denied. We struggle to get traction or maybe adversity made it look impossible and it seemed like the only thing that made sense was to just give up.

Don’t lose heart. Adversity is not the indicator that you are on the wrong path. Let me repeat that. Adversity is not the indicator that you are on the wrong path! If adversity was the litmus test as to whether or not we were in the will of God, we would have to say that Jesus was never in the will of God. He was constantly being tested and the scribes and the Pharisees were always trying to find a reason to kill him. THAT’S some serious adversity!

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About a month before I turned 18 I recommitted my life to Christ. This was the single most important decision that I have ever made. I went “All In” that day and it had been the governing influence on my life from then until now.

Not long after that a dream began to emerge in my heart. I wanted to go to Bible School and become a minister. I began to think about how cool it would be if I could just help & minister to people all the time. Of course, at the time, I was green as grass and didn’t know anything about the Bible or God. Even though there was a great desire, for some reason I could never seem to get my life put together enough to go to Bible school.

Over the next few years, I had a few false starts but still was never able to get the dream off the ground. I grew in my industry and had a pretty good job. I found my bride and we started a family together. I was involved and developing in our church. Things were good. I was able to help and minister to people sometimes…I was almost there, but not quite. Pastor Keith Moore says it this way, “If its not quite, its not right”. That was the situation with me. I still had this enormous pull in my heart that I couldn’t get away from.

Fast forward 20 years. Its the week between Christmas and New Years eve 2005 when the Lord made it known to me that it’s time. I didn’t hear an audible voice but I had a VERY strong assurance in my heart that it was now time to go to Bible school and I knew exactly where. The school that I was going to attend only admitted in the fall. They didn’t have mid year admittance at the time, so I knew that I had until August 2006 to get my business in order. I still didn’t know how I was going to do it but the Lord helped me to understand that If He’s calling me to do it, He’s also equipped me to do it. As the next several months unfolded, we uprooted our lives and moved to another state, I got a second shift job, we bought a home and I went back to school.  It all worked out amazingly.  It was true divine guidance.

While it sounds like an immense step to uproot your life and rebuild in an area where it appears that you have no contacts, family or support network, the right thing to do is to always obey. I will also add this comment. The safest place on earth in the will of God. What I’ve discovered about God’s will for your life is this. He will always work in you until you want it. He will not have you do anything that you are afraid of or that you are unequipped to do.

Consider Joshua in the Bible. Joshua, along with Caleb and 10 other men were sent into the Promised land across the Jordan river to spy it out and bring a report back to Moses. You can read the tragedy of what happened in Numbers 13 & 14.  The 10 spies brought back an evil report that caused the people’s hearts to melt. Joshua and Caleb brought back a good report and tried to stir the people up to believe the promise and move forward. The people believed the 10 spies and their evil report and actually wanted to stone Joshua and Caleb.

Here’s the thing. Joshua knew it was God’s plan for him to go into the promised land but the rebellion of the people put that promise off for a full 40 years. So for the next four decades Joshua serves Moses as they lead the people in the wilderness. Four decades of Promise Land Dreamin’ while wandering in the hot sun and sand.

When the time finally came, Moses had died and it was Joshua’s job to lead the children of Israel into the promised land. It was such a big deal for Joshua that the Lord encouraged him and said in Joshua 1:6 “Be strong and of a good courage”, in 1:7 “Be strong and very courageous” and in 1:9 “Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the LORD thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.” The Hebrew definition of the word translated “be strong” is: to fasten, fortify, strengthen. It paints a picture of laying hold of or grabbing and not letting go. Likewise, the definition of the word used here for “courage” means: Be alert. Steadfastly minded. Obstinate. We can see that God was encouraging Joshua to grab a hold of the promise and become stubborn about letting it go. To become laser focused on the promise and to protect that focus.

Joshua needed to hear that because of the massive job he had been handed and had to over-see. That is exactly what you need to do too. You need to go back to the beginning. Back to the promise that started you on your path, and then lock your focus on it. Become stubborn about it. When people are discouraged, its because they have been distracted. Don’t allow yourself to become distracted by things that have far less importance in your life.  Don’t be distracted by pressure, busyness or what seems like slow progress. Look how long it took me? Look how long it took Joshua.

I can say now as I look behind me that all that time that I thought I was just waiting, I was actually growing. The Lord led me to make my move when I was mature enough and had faith enough to do it. Had I jumped the gun, I could have messed up my life and possibly destroyed my marriage. My point is that God is on your side and He wants to bring you in to your promise. Don’t get impatient or become weary, just trust.

I have had to divide this post up because of length. I have a lot more to say but your time is valuable to me and I never want to take if for granted.

So what can you do this week to re-engage your focus? God has put a dream in your heart but you need to move toward it. Write the scripture promises concerning your dream on cards or post-it style notes and put them on your bathroom mirror and in your car so you can be constantly reminded of them. Read them and say them out-loud every day. Make them first person and put your name in them as you say them.

Scripture references: Deut 6. Josh 1:9. Mark 11:23,24. Heb 4:14 & 10:23.

Need to Make a Change? Start with Your Thoughts!

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Most of us have things about us that we would like to change.  Most of us don’t give much thought to how.  Change happens when we change the way we think.  In this weeks video post I’ll talk about the need for change and also practical ways from the Bible to start change for the better in your own life.

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I would love to hear what you think.  Share your story.  How have you been able to make positive change in your own life?  Please join the conversation by clicking here.

Where have all the fathers gone?

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tears1A few years ago I was at a funeral visitation.  There was a young lady there who I know pretty well and she’s dear to my heart.  Her parents had divorced many years ago and both had remarried and she grew up living with her mom & step dad.  She had never really had a strong relationship with her real dad.  While he had always lived nearby, he was never around and didn’t really have an active part in her life.  At this visitation, both of her parents and their families were there.  She went up to her dad to say hi and hopefully have a conversation.  All she got from him was a “Hey” and that was it…for the whole night.  He didn’t get up to hug her or make any attempt to have a conversation or show kindness toward her at all.  I spoke with her briefly about it and tears welled up in her eyes.  She couldn’t understand why.  That night was just one of many disappointing times in her life where she just couldn’t understand why.

Dads!  Don’t do this to your kids!  There is no acceptable excuse for it.  When you became a dad, one of your primary jobs became getting that child to adulthood sufficiently equipped to handle it and your job is too important for you to blow off so easily.  If you care about your children then stop being lazy and make a change.

Be there. In study after study, kids consistently say they would like to have more time with their dads. Regardless of whether a dad shares a home with the children and their mother, the kids need dad time. Working together on a chore or simply hanging out can be as meaningful as attending events or having adventures. Kids want to know their fathers. Just as important, they want their fathers to know them.

– See more at: http://www.fathersforgood.org/ffg/en/fathers_essential/whats_dad.html#sthash.bu8AHG5W.dpuf

Some of you may want to but are afraid that it may be too late.  Too much water has gone under the bridge and you can’t recover the broken relationship.  Bull!  As long as you both have a breath and a heartbeat there’s still hope.  Even if you meet resistance, your child is still worth pursuing and that relationship worth building.  You may think that they are doing alright without you but that’s deception.  If you are really interested in loving and helping them, they will greatly benefit from you being there and what you have to offer.  If your son or daughter has become VERY hard hearted because of your absence, you as a father should be prepared to spend the rest of your life trying to make it right and rebuild that relationship.  That is the commitment of a real father; the rest of your life.

Don’t wait for them.  Your kids may be grown up but when it comes to you, in their mind and in the relationship they have with you, they will always be your children.  You be the adult and make the first move.  Too many dads are forcing their sons and daughters to be the mature ones instead of standing up and taking personal responsibility for the broken relationship that their absence has created.  Enough.  No excuses. Make it right.

“My new wife doesn’t want the kids from my previous marriage around”.  While this situation will create a difficulty for you, this should have been settled before you remarried.  This argument will not hold water when you stand before your creator and give account.  When we look at the scripture, we see that the marriage covenant is over when one of the covenant partners dies (Rom 7:2-3).  With the relationship between parents and children though, they are honored and recognized in heaven forever.  Your children will be your children forever. It Not just here on earth.  That’s why when a child is commanded to honor their father and mother, it doesn’t stop when the parents have passed away.  The commandment to honor them will endure for eternity.  In the King James Bible the word Heritage is mentioned 30 times.  Below is the Strong’s Hebrew definition of the most common tense.  It illustrates how important it is to God that we pass on good things to our children, and not just material things but also wisdom and understanding.  You can’t do that if you’re not there.

Heritage = H5159 (Strong’s)

נחלה      nachălâh   nakh-al-aw’    From H5157 (in its usual sense); properly something inherited, that is, (abstractly) occupancy, or (concretely) an heirloom; generally an estate, patrimony or portion: – heritage, to inherit, inheritance, possession.

Carrina & DadWhen I became a father, I established in my heart that one of my highest priorities was to be a godly father.  I realized that there were things in me that I needed to get out of me, because if I didn’t they would probably get into my daughters.  My fatherly example was gone when I was young so I went to God for guidance.  He in His faithfulness hooked me up with wonderful examples that I could observe and learn from.  My daughters are both adults now but I’m still their dad.  I told my children that even when they are older, If I see them heading toward disaster, I will still use all of my position and influence to change their course.  I don’t care how old they are.  That’s my commitment to them as their father.  And they, because they honor me, will at least hear my argument. I have endeavored to build strong relationships of trust and to demonstrate to them every day that I am on their side.

Sons & daughters.  When your dad reaches out, give him the chance.  Even though you may be absolutely “done” with him, when all the world is quiet and you are alone on your bed, you still wish things could be different.  Deep down you really do want a strong relationship with your dad.  If you have a chance to have what you want, don’t be stupid and destroy that chance.  Be open and realize that they are scared too.

I know many of you can relate to this post.  Have you had or have you witnessed a victory in this area?  Please join the conversation.  Also, If you think this would minister to someone, please share.

Dads – Life is too short for this. We need each other.  Somebody make a move!

 

 

The Very Next Step…

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stepping-outHave you ever found yourself cornered and didn’t know what to do?  Maybe you were foolish and your bad choices caught up to you or maybe you were the victim of someone else’s heartlessness. You find yourself stuck, suffering and don’t see a way out.  I know I’ve felt trapped before.

The year I graduated from high school I lost my driver’s license.  I lost it because I was uninsured and in more than one car accident.  The insurance companies for the other drivers wanted to recover damages from me that my insurance should have paid.  I was led to believe that until I paid that money I couldn’t get my license back.   My job was about 13 miles away.  I couldn’t get there in a timely manner anymore and part of my job was to make local deliveries so I was let go.  I now had a very large problem.  I couldn’t pay down any debt without a job but I couldn’t get & keep a decent paying job because I couldn’t get there.  My life sort of went on hold.  This was the last straw and it seemed like within a few days, my whole life fell apart.  I literally did not know what to do.  None of the options in front of me were good ones.  They were all bad…or so I thought.

Ben Stein
 There is no sudden leap into the stratosphere. There is only advancing step by step, slowly and tortuously, up the pyramid towards your goals.

THE VERY NEXT STEP!   If you find yourself in a situation like this, the very next step is a crucial one.  The next step can mean the difference between going deeper into your situation or it could be the very first step toward the answer that you so desperately need.  Think about it.  This next move could be the defining moment that changes everything.  My problem was that I sort of shut down and took on a victim mentality.  Never mind that it was ALL my fault!

I actually stopped taking steps for a while.  I was so polarized by the size and complexity of the situation I was in that I didn’t know what to do or what questions to ask.  Don’t allow yourself to get to this point.  Sometimes no action is the worst action. You can only effectively steer a moving vehicle. Even if it starts out going the wrong direction, it can only be corrected if it’s moving.  You can’t give up.

WHERE IS GOD IN ALL OF THIS?  Psalm 25:5 (NKJ) says “Lead me in your truth, and teach me: for you are the God of my salvation; on you I wait all the day“. Isaiah 48:17 (BBE) says “The Lord who takes up your cause, the Holy One of Israel, says, I am the Lord your God, who is teaching you for your profit, guiding you by the way in which you are to go”.  I know that sometimes the pressures of life can act like blinders and all you see is the problem.  Lift your eyes.  God Himself has promised to lead you if you will listen.  He will guide you “for your profit”.  He doesn’t want you to suffer, He takes NO pleasure in it.  He wants you to have peace.  Sometimes when you’re right in the thick of the battle, it may seem like you have to take five steps before you’re close enough to even ask for help but that is not the truth.  God says in Hebrews 13:5 “I will never leave you, nor forsake you”.  You will never be out of His reach.  He says in Isaiah 59:1 (WEB) “Behold, Yahweh’s hand is not shortened, that it can’t save; neither His ear heavy, that it can’t hear”.  The separation is on our part.  We fail to look to Him for help.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
 The heights charm us, but the steps do not; with the mountain in our view we love to walk the plains.

THE BREAK THROUGH.   Remember, I said I stopped moving forward.  It took me a little while to start moving again.  A few years later, through many wonderful events, too many to talk about here, I was able to get a good job and even get married,  but I still didn’t have my license.  I really wanted to get this fixed but still didn’t know how.  I had however been praying about it a lot and asking specifically for wisdom to know what to do.  One night while relaxing in the bathtub (Yes, God can deal with you anywhere) the Lord began to deal with my heart.  I didn’t hear a voice or anything like that but a thought occurred to me just as clear as if I has spoken it myself.  “Have you done everything you CAN do?”  In a split second I could see that there was ONE thing that I COULD do.  I could pay the re-instatement fee.  I didn’t have the thousands of dollars it would take to clear the whole mess up, but I had the re-instatement fee.  So I paid it.  Why you may ask?  Because it was the one thing I COULD do, so I did it trusting that God would make something out of it.

A few weeks later I received a call from a very nice lady who worked for the Secretary of State’s office in the state where I lived.  She indicated that she had received a check from me and was wondering why.  I explained my whole situation to her and about paying the re-instatement fee.  She then began to give me a very detailed roadmap to fix my situation.  She told me what forms I needed and where to get them.  She told me what to do in each situation in order to get resolution.  I thanked her and hung up the phone.  I don’t remember today if I jumped around the room or not but I remember being “off the hook” excited.  I was thanking God!  To make a long story short, within two months I had my license and had about $7,000 of an $11,000 debt forgiven.  God knew exactly who I needed to talk to.  I am convinced to this day that it was a divine setup.

Step in Sand

The thing I want you to remember is this.  You are never more than one step away from the right direction.  You are never more than one step away from help.  I don’t care how dark it may appear where you are, God is not too far away!  Let Him lead you.  The very next step could be the first step toward the answer.

How can you move forward?  Even if it seems like an insignificant step, what could you do?  What example in your own life could you share to help others?  Please join the conversation by leaving a comment.

 

 

 

 

Are people trying to hold you back? Here’s what to do.

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traffic cone When I was a younger man, I was an angry man. I had a thin skin and I took everything to heart. I lived in a constant state of being offended because someone didn’t take me seriously enough, or mocked me in some way. Even when my friends would joke around with me, it was always a gamble as to whether or not I would take it the right way or get upset. Remember what I said in a previous post? We all want everyone to always at all times think the very best of us. I realize I’m not alone in this. Many of us struggle with this same thing.

I thank God that I worked with one man who had the guts to be direct with me about this. He came to me one day and said “You need to deal with your attitude. No one likes working with you and you might get fired”. In my opinion, he was a pretty nice and well liked man. I also knew that he didn’t want me to get fired. I knew that his words were coming from real concern, so I asked him for help. One of the first assignments that he gave me was to read the book How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. It started me down the road to changing myself and helped me immeasurably. I now try to read this book at least once every two years.

I began to really apply myself to be better in these areas and I began to really grow. Some years later, the son of a co-worker was working with us as a general worker over the summer. I was working near him one day and tried on several occasions to start a friendly conversation to no avail. He would not converse with me. I have known this young man since he was in grade school and he was a good boy. As far as I could remember, I had not done anything to hurt him. I didn’t understand why this happened. It’s hard to endure that kind of treatment and not get “sharp” with people, but I didn’t. I thought about it a lot though. After calming down and thinking about it logically, what I realized was that I was not spoken well of in his house. I worked with one of his parents and they, unfortunately, were still seeing me as the angry young man. This young man wasn’t seeing me for who I am, he was seeing me through a bias that was put into him long ago.

I realized that even though I had changed (and I had dramatically), I was not going to be allowed to redefine myself to these people. To them I was always going to be an angry young man. They were going to see everything I did through that lens.

We see that God told Abram to get out of his country, away from his relatives, and away from his father’s house and God would make of him a great nation (Gen 12:1-2). The Bible isn’t specific about this but I wonder if in order to make Abram a great nation, God first had to get him away from people who would not let him change. What if staying there would have kept him from ever reaching out to receive God’s will and plan. Abram may have had a relative that “put him in his place” every time he saw them.

Not even Jesus was immune to this. Mark 6:1-6 tells us that He went into His own neighborhood and began to teach in the synagogue but His friends, neighbors and family were astonished. They said “How’s he doing these miracles? And who taught him this stuff? He’s doing all these miracles, where did he get this power? Isn’t this the carpenter’s boy? Didn’t he fix the spoke on my ox cart just the other day? My boy has a crush on his little sister! His momma lives right over there!” The Bible says that even though they acknowledged that He was healing people and teaching wonderful things, that they were still offended by Him. The Bible says that He marveled at their unbelief and couldn’t do any mighty works there because of it. They were unwilling to let Him change! It was God’s will but that didn’t matter. They knew who He really was…or so they thought.

So what do you do? Sometimes the people who want to hold you back or hold you down are people that you really care about. How do you deal with it? The best way is to do what Jesus did.

    1. Identify it. Jesus called it out and pulled it into the light of day. I think it’s worthy of note that according to what Jesus said; a Prophet has no honor in the same places that God told Abram to leave. Country, kinfolks & father’s house. The people who know you best are often the ones who don’t like it when you are growing. Jesus pointed this out to them.

      If you want to maintain these relationships, you will need to address your situation directly. If these people truly care about you, they will adjust and be supportive.

    1. Don’t let it stop you! Jesus didn’t let it stop Him. He still laid His hands on a few sick folks and healed them. Even in the face of opposition that was trying to get Him to back down and get “back in His place”, He kept on doing what He knew was right.

      You need to make a quality decision that you will not stop doing what’s right just because others aren’t recognizing or accepting it. I am fully persuaded that a person should act according to their own decisions and not always just be reacting to what others do to them. Make the right choice and then dig in and stick to it.

    2. Work toward correcting the situation. Jesus went around the villages teaching. Even if only a few would listen, the seed would grow and the message would spread. He set about to build faith in the people. 

      You will need to become your own evangelist so to speak. Begin walking it out. So you’ve changed? Prove it! Every day with every step and every word.

    3. Set yourself apart. Abram left his whole identity behind in order to become what God had for him. You may not need to be that drastic, but you may need to leave some relationships behind. In drug and alcohol treatment, one of the things you must do in order to be successful at recovery is to Change Your Playground. The recovering person has to find friends that will not be sticking the addiction in their face all the time. Very often, if someone relapses, it’s because they started hanging out with old friends again. Changing your playground can be very painful but in order to move forward, it may be necessary. It also doesn’t mean that you have to amputate certain people, It may just mean that you have to keep them at arm’s length for a while.

When you start moving forward and begin to pass the limitations and boundaries that were holding you back, many will be supportive, but some won’t. The important thing is that you move in the right direction and that you fortify yourself to stay the course. Don’t let the negativity of others hold you back and continue to define you.

Join the conversation. How did you overcome the resistance from others who wouldn’t allow you to change? I would love to hear your comments.

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