What do I owe you?

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Is there a distinction between respect and honor? They are both of the heart and they both are shown by action. To say a person is respectable, or to say they are honorable would seem to be saying the same thing, except that there is more weight on the word Honor. Honor is equal to the highest level of respect. Remember the definition of honor? To honor is to value as heavy. When something was heavy, it was considered to be worth more. To honor is to value someone as very important to you, showing deference. Honor is also having a good name or public reputation. A showing of merited respect. High worth, and as a verb, a gesture of deference (bow). The root word in Hebrew literally means: To cause to shine, to glorify or to add luster.

Honor notes

When it comes to honor and respect, most people think about it two ways:

I. They demanding it for themselves. Have you ever been handed something by someone and when you reach and grab for it, they refuse to let it go until you say “Thank you”? They may even accompany their firm grip with the phrase “What do you say?” insisting that they be shown the politeness and respect that they are pretty sure they deserve. When most people think about respect, their thinking is self-centered – “You should respect ME!” It’s vitally important to remember that respect and honor come from the heart and by their nature, cannot be taken. They can only be given. Someone may demand respect but, unless their lives and actions command it, making such a demand, actually diminishes their respectability.

II. Some have the idea that they will only give honor and respect when they believe it’s been earned. “She hasn’t earned my respect”. There is a real problem with this thinking. It breeds hardhearted, stiff necked, rebellion. Some may let anger or bitter feelings dictate whether or not they can honor, or respect someone.  They may say “I have no respect for _____” but when we really look at it, feelings should not be allowed to get in the way of our showing honor to those to whom it’s due.

If respect is owed, it should be paid. If you owe someone honor, pay that honor. When most people think about respect, they don’t think this way. Instead, their thinking is self-centered – “They should respect ME!”  This is against scripture, which teaches that there are those who God Almighty commands us to honor. We owe it to these people and we need to give it to them.

Rom 13:7,8. Render therefore to all their dues: tribute to whom tribute is due; custom to whom custom; fear to whom fear; honor to whom honor. Owe no man anything, but to love one another: for he that Loves another has fulfilled the law.

If you make a debt without being certain how you are going to pay it back, you are setting yourself up to steal. You may think of yourself as an upstanding citizen who always follows the law, and would never intentionally do anything wrong, but if you don’t have a plan to pay what you owe, you will probably over extend your ability, and leave someone who trusted you, wishing they hadn’t.  It doesn’t matter at this point what kind of person you think you are. Your image of yourself does not match the cold, hard reality of who you are. You are self-deceived. You have judged yourself by your intentions, while the rest of the world is judging you by the outcome.

In the same way, you owe a debt of love, respect and honor to certain people. Keeping Romans 13:7 & 8 in context, Paul is talking about rendering respect and honor.  He indicates in this passage that there are those to whom honor is due.  If it’s due (owed), and we refuse to pay it, is it stealing?  While we might think that they don’t deserve our respect, we need to respect or honor those God tells us to, out of honor for Him.

There are those out there who are starving for someone to hold them as valuable, craving the feeling of being held in honor and viewed as important. They may have longed for it all their lives but have felt powerless to change it.  Many thinking it is out of their hands. But…there is something that they CAN do.

Rev. Keith Moore says it this way “Pay the respect you owe, and reap the respect you sow”.  Isn’t that good.  When we obey God in this area, and honor by faith, even when we don’t feel like it, we’re planting seed that will grow into a harvest in our own lives.  Think on that for a minute.

Pay the respect you owe, and reap the respect you sow.  – Keith Moore

Jesus said in Mark 4:26 – 28,  “So is the kingdom of God, as if a man should cast seed into the ground; and should sleep, and rise night and day, and the seed should spring and grow up, he knows not how. For the earth brings out fruit of itself, first the blade, then the ear, after that the full grain in the ear.”  Think about it for a minute…The whole kingdom works this way, but we need to understand that it all started with a seed.  If we want to be honored and valued, we need to begin sowing honor and value.  If we can learn to give honor when it’s due, we will begin to see the fruit of honor showing up in our own lives.

Are you ready to take a step?  Find someone you owe honor, or respect to this week and find a way to intentionally show it.  Remember, Father’s day is the 19th.  A perfect time to express honor!

If you have been helped and think this could help others, please consider sharing it with them.

I appreciate you!

What is Honor?

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What does it mean to be honored? I did a google search for images of honor and several images were found of the U.S. President placing a medal around the neck of a soldier. We celebrated Memorial Day recently where we honor the memory of our fallen soldiers. A large part of the observance of Memorial Day is to show honor by decorating their tombs and grave sites, and showing reverence for their sacrifice. It would seem then that honor has something to do with medals & decorations.

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While we do show honor through medals & decorations, in most cases, what we are really honoring is an act. Usually an act of courage, valor, or bravery. Acts come from the inside of people. Consistent acts reveal what is in the heart in abundance. It is in times of long service, or service under high distress and danger that a person’s true character is revealed. It is in moments like these, when some people rise up to a level of true greatness, revealing qualities of exceptional leadership, bravery or self sacrifice. In the act of honoring, we are acknowledging in them a high quality that we revere and value. We are ornamenting a person because they have made a significant impact for good to those around them. They have made a difference.

When we look to scripture, we see in Malachi 1:6 God the Father is asking a question of the priests. He says “A son honors his father, and a servant honors his master. So if I am a father, where is my honor? If I am a master, where is my respect? You priests who despise my name.”

“I am not bound to win, but I am bound to be true. I am not bound to
succeed, but I am bound to live up to what light I have.”
― Abraham Lincoln

In this scripture we see both sides of honor. God says “If I am and Father and a Master, where’s my honor?” Implying that God expected to be honored and respected. The farther implication is that God expects that parents and masters (employers) are to be honored and respected also. (Ex 20:12. Eph 6:1-3. Col 3:22. 1 Pet 2:18).

Recently I saw a picture on social media of a man with his Bible on his knee and his hand wresting on it. In his hand was a lit cigar. I don’t remember what his caption said, but it was something like “this is church this morning”. This man’s father is a well respected minister with international influence. This man’s wife is also a minister working hard to grow her influence.

One of my first thoughts when I saw the picture was “Did his dad teach at home what he was teaching publicly?” Here’s why I’m bringing this up. This young man has what appears to be a successful business in town. At least in part, the success of the business is because his dad leveraged his own influence to help his son get launched. Many of the people who are following this young man on social media are doing so because of his father. Many of the people who saw that picture follow his father and whether people will admit it or not, this picture struck a blow against his father’s credibility. I will not say that it ruined it because his dad is a fine, upstanding man. I will say though, that it caused questions to be asked that would not have even been thought before the picture was posted. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. The beginning of honor is to not cause shame (see The Road To Honor) .

Hypothetically, what if someone were considering asking this man’s wife to minister in their church, but decided against it because of this photo? I am not this man’s conscience. I am not his judge. My points here are based completely on the topic of honor and the apparent thoughtlessness of his actions.

“The most tragic thing in the world is a man of genius who is not a man of honor.”
― George Bernard Shaw

What is honor? Honor is to value as heavy. In the old days when barter and trade would happen, weights and scales were used to determine the value of things. Heavy usually meant better. Even in quality, heavy usually meant better built with more sturdy materials. When something was heavy, it was considered to be worth more. To honor is defined as value as heavy, Showing deference. A good name or public reputation. A showing of merited respect. High worth, and as a verb, a gesture of deference (bow).

The root word in Hebrew literally means: To cause to shine, to glorify or to add luster. This is the definition that I think of when I think of honor. When I think about my relationship with God, my parents & my leaders, I understand that I always need to be reverentially respectful toward them and to always live my life in a way that causes them to shine. I live to add luster to them. This is honor – and as you can see, honor comes from living from what they put into you. This is why poor choices bring dishonor and shame to them.

For me, the clearest example of honor was found in my paternal grandmother. She and my grandpa had been together for many years and raised nine children. When he passed away, she had a large photo of him framed and placed prominently on the wall in her living room. One Sunday afternoon when I stopped by for a visit, she confided in me that sometimes, when she was alone, she would talk to him. She also told me that she kissed that picture at night before she went to bed. This illustrates honor so clearly to me because of the way she honors his memory. She was showing how much she loved him and how heavily she valued him.

Honor is lacking in our world today. People hear the word and don’t understand what it really means. Because of this, they can’t do it and are suffering because of it. In the next few weeks, I want to go deeper into it and talk more about what it is, but also who we are to honor and what the benefits are because we walk in honor.

Understanding that to honor is to value, take some time this week to examine your life? Are you honoring those you should be honoring? Are you walking worthy of it yourself? Join the discussion by leaving a comment.

I appreciate you all!

Art

***Quotes above were found at:
http://www.goodreads.com

 

The Missing Link Between Failure and Success.

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When I rededicated my life to the Lord, it wasn’t very long before someone lent me a teaching series.  It was a tremendous series about how we see God.  It was called “The Image of God in You”.  It was a good kick-start for me in my walk with God and it berthed in me a hunger for the Word.  It started to make sense to me and I wanted to know all I could know about this life in Christ.  I was so hungry to hear what that minister was saying that I remember starting the first tape (yes they were cassettes back then) at about 11:00 pm and pulling the last tape out of the player at about 6:30 the next morning.  It was amazing.  If you had asked me just a few weeks before that if I would want to stay up all night listening to someone preach, I would have said “Um…No thank you!”

I became ravenous concerning the Word of God.  I wanted as much as I could get.  I wanted to learn.  I wanted to know more about who I was in Christ.  More about my relationship with my Heavenly Father.  My life in Christ was real to me and I wanted to know how to live it.

The problem that developed for me though, was that with all the consumption going on, there wasn’t very much “Doing”.

James 1:22 says that we are to be doers of the Word of God and not hearers only, deceiving ourselves.  It goes on in in verse 25 to say that the one who is not a forgetful hearer but a doer, shall be blessed in his or her deeds.

This brings to mind the popular bible verse in the John 8:31 & 32 where Jesus said “If you continue in my Word, then are you my disciple in deed, and you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.”

Understand here that it’s not the plain truth that makes you free.  There are conditions that come with freedom.  Jesus said “If you continue in my Word…”  Staying in the Word is a prerequisite to walking in freedom.

We see in James 1:25 some characteristics of the one that looks into the Perfect Law of Liberty, and continues in it.

  1. They Will Remember – They will not be forgetful hearers.
    Deuteronomy 6 points out how we are to operate concerning this perfect law of liberty.
    -Keep these words, which I say to you this day, deep in your hearts;
    -Teaching them to your children with all care.
    -Talk of them when you are at rest in your house.
    -Talk of them walking by the way.
    -Talk of them when you go to sleep.
    -Talk of them when you get up.
    -Let them be fixed as a sign on your hand.
    -Let them be marked on your brow.
    -Have them lettered on the pillars of your houses.
    -Have them written over the doors of your towns.
  2. They Will Be A Doer – putting it into action.
    We see in James that real faith brings action.  While we are truly justified before God by faith, real faith is always accompanied by corresponding action.  When Abraham put Isaac on the altar in Genesis 22, he was acting in faith.  Hebrews 11:19 tells us that Abraham received Isaac raised from the dead in a figure.  Abraham fully intended to sacrifice the son of promise because he walked by faith, and demonstrated his faith with his actions.  We know that Abraham didn’t have to follow through.  God provided for Himself a sacrifice. This is when Abraham called the place Jehovah Jireh.

This person who makes it a point to be a doer and not just a hearer only will be blessed in their deeds.  That bringing it back around to John 8.  It’s not just the truth that makes you free.  It’s not even the truth you read, or the truth you love.  Scripture says it’s the truth that you KNOW that makes you free, and the inference is that its the truth you know and DO that makes you free.  Your favorite scripture will have absolutely no affect on your life whatsoever… if you will not act on it.

The Truth you know demands action.  Most of us as believers are not defeated by what we don’t know.  We’re defeated by the truth we know but are not doing.

This also comes with a warning.  If you are not a doer of the Word, but you hear a lot of Word, you may be self deceived into thinking that you are more spiritual than you really are.  The self deceived are those that think they are spiritual because they have heard a lot of good teaching.  The sad truth about those who are hearers only is that with each truth they learn, they put themselves “on the hook” to do it.  When they don’t do it, they just increase their disobedience to God.

I want to be fully obedient in everything. I’m sure you do too.  I don’t want to leave anything undone. I have started making a confession as often as I think about it, that I am a doer of the Word of God.

I want to encourage you to examine yourself.  Where do you stand?  I also want to challenge you to put action to your faith. Be a Doer!

 

Becoming A Better Man.

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The driving force that is Dad.

Many of you know that my parents divorced when I was ten. After that, my dad just stepped away from all of us. From that time to this, I’ve only seen him once for a couple of weeks at the end of 1985. It seems that when my dad divorced my mom, he also divorced the children he had with her. I can’t fully articulate how I felt from being rejected by him.

One of my psychology professors once said that Love and Hate are very closely related. Many think they are opposites but that’s not true. They are both powerful emotions that come from relationships. The opposite of either is I Don’t Care. When relationships break up, whether they be marriages, long term dating relationships, or parent & child relationships, it’s the thought of “I no longer care” coming from a place where “I love you” used to come from that wounds the heart over and over again.

Man hat backward silhouette

It’s the thought of “I no longer care” coming from a place where “I love you” used to come from that wounds the heart.

For the next seven years, I had a pretty rough time. I was hurt, I was angry, I was brokenhearted, I was lost, I had big trust issues & big authority issues. I was betrayed, rejected and left twisting in the breeze by one of the two people I trusted most in the world. I did what I see a lot of young men doing today, I turned my hurt into anger.

For years I asked the question “What did I do?” Part of the reason I was struggling so much was that I couldn’t figure out what I had done to cause him to step away from me. Through my teens I learned how to party. As I look back now, I see that my party lifestyle was because I was looking for acceptance.  I got it to a degree from the people I hung with. I hung with those because they gave me a place to belong. I wasn’t myself when I was with my friends – it wasn’t safe to be myself with them. They were a rough bunch of guys, but the way I looked at it, at least I had friends.

As I grew up, I began to really resent my Dad. I determined that I was going to be a better man than he was. I turned my anger and resentment into fuel. The more I thought about him, the more I determined that I was going to be better in every way. I was going to become a great guy and he was not going to be able to take credit for it. I would be self made.

It wasn’t until after I recommitted my life to the Lord that I began to see the problem with my thinking. I was walking in bitterness and unforgiveness. Bitterness is bondage and it was keeping me from enjoying my life. The unforgiveness in my heart was actually keeping me from receiving forgiveness. It was also causing me to hold on to my hurt & torment myself with it. Not only that, but if there was ever going to be an opportunity to reconcile, unforgiveness would not allow it to happen.

The Lord began to work in my heart concerning my dad. It started when I began to see how much God loved me. When this understanding came, It changed everything. God loves me. Wow! When I would read in Romans 8:31 & 32 I would begin to tear up. It says :

What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us? He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things?

I began to see that my Heavenly Father loved me. Fear began to fall away from me because I finally found my place. The place where I am accepted and received in Christ Jesus. I began to operate from a different place. Not a place of fear and self-centeredness where my eyes were always on me. I was no longer constantly thinking about how bad I had it. My mind wasn’t always on how much of a victim I was. I had a new point of view. I began to understand that God was for me. I now began to see everything from a position of strength. I was a son of God and He was for me. I didn’t have much to offer Him in return. I just wanted Him to be pleased with me in all my ways.

Being a better man starts with being a good son.

It didn’t take too long for me to understand that God wanted me to honor my dad. He wanted me to walk in love toward my dad. My Heavenly Father wanted me to be an even better man than I had attempted to become in my anger. God wants me to be a good son. Being a better man starts with being a good son.  That day I began a journey to be all the son I could be. I’m still on this journey but the Lord has put it on my heart to share my journey because there are so many who have a similar story. Many who don’t have a strong relationship with either their dad or mom and it torments them. It’s not God’s will or plan for us to be tormented. He’s helped me grow in wonderful ways and has put it on my heart to help others.

I can help you.

We can move forward together.

Your Time = Your Life.

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Have you ever heard the idea that space is a fabric? All the events that we see are actually hung in this fabric. They are static and we are the ones in motion.  In motion, in that we are moving through time.  We move past these events and observe them as being events but in reality, they are there constantly and as we move past them in time, they have the appearance of “happening”.  This is radical over-simplification of part of a theory by a brilliant physicist named Richard Feynmann called Sum over Histories.

Einstein’s theory of Special Relativity states that light, rather than time is the constant in the universe.  The closer an object comes to traveling at light speed, the slower time becomes and at light speed, time stops.

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I think that the eternal perspective is to see all of time at once.  Every outcome readily visible.  Scripture states that God declares the end from the beginning (Is 46:10). Scripture also says in Heb_4:3, For we which have believed do enter into rest, as he said, As I have sworn in my wrath, if they shall enter into my rest: although the works were finished from the foundation of the world.  

Unfortunately for us, while we are on earth, we are stuck in time.  Being stuck in time, time is measuring our life.  You may have heard the story about the the dates on the headstone.  The first date represents the persons’ birth & the second, their death.  The hyphen between the numbers is what is really important.  That hyphen represents their life.  It represents how they spent their small but extremely precious time on earth.

Opportunity cost is truly illustrated in the spending of time. Once it’s spent, there is no getting it back.  Your time is a truly non-renewable resource.  What do you spend yours on?  What opportunity did you give up, so that you could do what you’re doing now?

When we are looking at someone’s time, we’re really looking at someone’s life. Their life is passing with each second.  When we interact, we are spending our life on each other.   When others are spending time on us, we should make sure that what we are asking them to spend their time on is valuable and not frivolous. Make sure it’s worth the price being paid for it.

I think it’s a tragedy to see even a small piece of someone’s life being wasted because someone else didn’t have the sense to respect their time, and there-by, wasted a precious piece of their life.

As a Christian with a heart to help others, my heart burns within me sometimes because I have so much I want to do.  I read Paul, the Apostle’s command to the Ephesian church:

See then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise, Redeeming the time, because the days are evil Eph 5:15 & 16.

And to the Colossian church:

Walk in wisdom toward them that are without, redeeming the time Col 4:5.

This is the heart of the Lord.  My mandate is to redeem the time.  Buy it back.  Be intentional about how I spend it & leverage it to wring the most out of it for the Kingdom.  There’s a great work to be done.  He’s given each of us a place and a job to do.  Time is shorter than we think.

Take some time this week to examine yourself.  How are you spending your time? Because you are spending your life.

How Promotion Comes.

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If we could promote ourselves, we might all be at the very top of our respective companies. We might all be making top money. We could show up at the company that we owned, at about 10:30 in the morning, driving our brand new Aston Martin Vanquish…Okay, that might just be me.

$100 bills

I am curious though. How many of us would hesitate to promote ourselves because we knew deep down that we lack the skills and credentials to do the higher paying, higher responsibility jobs? I think most of us would probably give ourselves the benefit of the doubt and go ahead & try. Sadly, this would likely result in many companies failing within just a few months.

Truthfully, while you can’t directly promote yourself, you have a lot of control over whether or not you actually get promoted. It’s true. It’s mostly up to you. Let’s look at the example of David in the Bible.

In just the few verses of Psalm 78:70-72, we learn quite a bit about how and why God chose David to be King of Israel.

 

Psa 78:70 He also chose His servant David, and took him from the folds of the flock;

71 He brought him in from the suckling ewes; He brought him to feed His people Jacob, and His inheritance, Israel.

72 And he fed them in the integrity of his heart; and guided them in the skillfulness of his hands. (LIT)

 

We see that God chose David. David did not directly choose this for himself. But what was behind God’s choice? What did He see in David?

We see that God separated him from the sheep fold. David was a shepherd. David was caring for sheep, but not just sheep, lots of baby lambs. The King James version of verse 71 says God took him from following the ewes, great with young. David was shepherding birthing mothers & lots of babies. I can just imagine David now, setting on a log with a lamb in his lap while he is hand feeding it, as he looks out watchfully over the flock to make sure they are all safe.

God joined him to His people. David’s mandate from Heaven was to feed Jacob and Lead Israel. I think this is telling. It shows us God’s heart toward His people and the specific traits he looks for in those he chooses to lead them.

So why did God choose him? Verse 72 says David fed them (Jacob) in the integrity of his heart, and he guided them (Israel) in the skillfulness of his hands.

God saw him doing this with the lambs. God saw his integrity and his skill & wisdom while he was just watching the sheep. David was faithful in the little things and did them with integrity.

So, what kind of shepherd was David? We get a little taste from 1 Sam 17.

1Sa 17:34 And David said to Saul, Your servant has been a shepherd among sheep for his father. And the lion came, and the bear, and took away a sheep out of the flock.

35 And I went out after him and struck him, and delivered out of his mouth. And he rose against me, and I took hold of his beard and struck him, and killed him.

36 Your servant has struck both the lion and the bear, and this uncircumcised Philistine shall be as one of them, for he has reproached the armies of the living God.

37 And David said, Jehovah, who has delivered me out of the paw of the lion, and out of the paw of the bear, He shall deliver me from the hand of this Philistine. And Saul said to David, Go, and Jehovah be with you.

 

  • David was a man of faith! We can see that David had a very deep trust in God. He knew who he was in regard to the covenant.
  • David values the flock. We also see that when it came to the sheep, David considered his lambs so valuable that he went out, confronted and killed predators that were known to kill people. He did it more that once. Even one sheep was so important to David that he put his own life on the line to save it.
  • David was selfless. This was so powerful to God that he said of David “I found David” the son of Jesse “to be a man according to My own heart, who will do all My will.” (Acts 13:22 LIT).
  • We see something similar when Paul was writing to the Corinthian church. He said “And I will very gladly spend and be spent for you; though the more abundantly I love you, the less I be loved.” 2Co 12:15.
  • And again when Paul was writing to the Philippians, he tells them that he’s getting ready to send Timothy to them. He shows us why he is sending Timothy and not some other “Well Known” minister. Timothy had the same heart that Paul had. Paul said “For I have no man like-minded, who will naturally care for your state. For all seek their own, not the things which are Jesus Christ’s. Phil 2:20, 21. Everybody else had self serving motives.

So what does this mean for us? What is the take away here?

God Himself said that David was a man after His own heart, who would fulfill all His will. The secret to David’s success wasn’t found just in God “Picking” him and then he became great. The anointing came on him when Samuel poured oil over his head, but the qualities that made him an excellent king were already in him and made him an excellent shepherd. He walked ever day in faith, integrity, wisdom & skillfulness. He didn’t just do his best, he did his best to do it God’s way.

Think about it. If I’m looking for good help to do something I need done, I’m looking for someone who can faithfully do it THE WAY I WOULD DO IT. How many times have you been the recipient of someone’s help and you had to do it over when they left?

God is looking for people who will submit to His will, do things His way & do them faithfully. These are the same attributes that will cause you to get promotion in every area of your life.

I invite you to take some time this week to examine your own heart. Ask yourself this one question.

Are you doing it all Your Way?

Do Unto Others – (A message for fathers)

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Today’s post is a guest post by my friend Debi Reece.

He was a little fella, single digits, seated in Children’s Church, head bowed as he colored the paper tie he was given by the teacher.  The teacher that knew, on this Father’s Day, he had no father to give it to.  I can’t imagine what went through his little mind while he listened all about daddies and worked on his daddy project.  I can’t imagine because I don’t want my own heart ripped in shreds.  I don’t want to feel the grief, the sweet innocent hoping, that would be unrequited.  This little guy deserved the love of a daddy, just like the other boys that would rush up to their dads with delight in their eyes, expectant hugs and gratitude their reward.

Child_drawing

On this day, he held the scribbled crayoned tie in his little hands as he walked up the stairs to the sanctuary to me, his mother.  Sweet little blonde haired boy, holds out the tie and tells me that he has to give this to a daddy.  I died a million deaths in an instant, paralyzed. He begins to look around the church, and spots a young dad, the father of a boy in his class.  He sees the boy give his dad the tie, and he turns to me…there! there’s a daddy!  I look up to see the man’s wife, and with a lump larger than one I’ve felt ever and since, I tell her that he needs to give this to a daddy and he saw your husband.  She nods.  I watch him run up to the man and hand his precious gift to him.  He accepts it and gives him a hug.  I am grateful. I am devastated.  I am appalled that fatherless children are coaxed to color paper ties for daddies that do not exist in their lives.  I condemn myself for making such a poor choice.  I seethe with anger at his dad.  I cry in despair. I forgive.  I struggle with forgiveness.  I am weary of the emotions and the wondering if I have really forgiven.

I don’t know if the man realized what a precious innocent gift he had been given.  I know that God’s heart had to ache.  I believe God kept that little tie, somehow and some way. His Word says if your father or mother forsake you, I will lift you up.  It is not easy to trust a Daddy God when earthly daddy wasn’t around.  So many men have been there.  So many struggled with pain, envy when they saw friends with daddies.  How unfair to bring such pain on an innocent soul that God gave you to love.  So many times the cycle is perpetuated, but it is time to stop.  It’s time to Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.  If you are a father that had no example, what would you have wanted?  What did you need?  Why not give it to your child?  Why not seek the Bible, your church, prayer, godly counsel to help you be the dad you never had but can be to your child?  That takes courage.  That takes love.  You deserve to be the dad your child needs and they deserve to be pure treasure to you.

 

Debi BantaDebi is a Family Resource Specialist with Community Action.  She has been with the local Community Action agency since 2002.  Community Action Agencies exist throughout the nation to alleviate the causes and conditions of poverty.  They strive to enrich the lives of families and individuals within the community by providing opportunities, offering assistance and empowering people to make positive change. Debi most enjoys being a conduit to share resources with those in need, particularly Life Skills classes that share knowledge that makes a long term difference.
Debi is now an empty nester with nine grandchildren.

Money, Sorrow & The Right Pursuits.

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This last week, as I was doing my daily Bible reading, I came across Proverbs 22:4.  As I began to study it a little bit, I noticed that verses 1-7 all seemed to be related.  Verse 4 says “By humility and the fear of the Lord are riches, and honor, and life.  Now Proverbs says a lot about being diligent and not being slothful, but I noticed that neither of those traits were listed here when talking about obtaining riches, honor or life.

Verse 1 of chapter 22 also says “A good name is rather to be chosen than great riches, and loving favor rather than silver and gold.  To top it all off, in verses 6 & 7 it tells us “If a child is trained up in the right way, even when he is old he will not be turned away from it.  7 The man of wealth has rule over the poor, and he who gets into debt is a servant to his creditor.” (Bible in Basic English – BBE).

This week I posted a video where I talk at length about this.

Scriptures referenced in the video are Proverbs 22:1-7, Proverbs 10:22, Matt 6:33 & 1 Tim 6:10.

If this video helps you and you think it can help someone else, please share and subscribe.

Thank you and as always- I really appreciate you!

Art

Does the “Who” change the quality or level of Love from YOU?

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Matthew 5:43-48 New International Version (NIV)

43 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor, and hate your enemy.’
44 But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,
45 that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.
46 If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that?
47 And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that?
48 Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.

Back of Girls Staring into distance

Have you ever witnessed someone receiving special treatment because of who they are? Maybe the pretty girl buying popcorn at the movies didn’t pay full price.  All because the young man behind the counter was trying to get her attention.  When we think of special treatment, we almost always think of it in a positive way. It’s not always the case. I remember hearing a story about a boy riding the school bus, who was beat up by some other boys just because of his last name. He was certainly receiving specific and different treatment, but it wasn’t good.

People with disabilities receive special treatment to accommodate their handicap.  We change the height of toilets, sinks & put in ramps for wheelchairs. Sometimes they’re also treated differently out of sympathy. Those without disability may look at them sadly as if to say “You poor thing”.  I don’t think most people with disabilities like that. There’s a great TEDtalk about it here.

In the movie The King’s Speech, Lionel Logue insisted on an equal relationship with King George VI when they were working together. When Prince Albert became King, he became known as George the VI.  His full name was Albert Frederick Arthur George. While he was prince, he went by Albert.  Lionel called him Bertie. He even went as far as to say, “My castle, my rules”. Lionel knew that in order for him to be able to really help, When they were working, Albert needed to be a student. Lionel realized that Their sessions together needed to be based on who he was, not on the fact that his student was royalty.

As believers, we too, need to make it a point to treat others based upon who we are, not who they are. In the verses above, Jesus points out how that in the world, the natural tendency is to respond to each other based upon who the other person is. Is he an enemy? Is she a friend? Is he rich? Is he or poor? Is she pretty?

All these things come into play when people are navigating through social interaction in this world. Not so with the church. Jesus said “Love your enemies & pray for those that persecute you”. We do this because we are children of God. Not for gain. Not to impress, or to exert influence, but because God commands it and it’s in us to do.

God loved us when we were His enemies. His love was made clear to us when we were opposing Him. God commends His love toward us in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. (Rom 5:8)

If you are a child of God, the Love of God has been shed abroad in your heart by the Holy Spirit which has been given to you (Rom 5:5). This means that the Love of God is on the inside of every believer.  We just need to begin to mature in it.

Some might say “I really love God! He an I are tight! It’s just all those creepy people I have to deal with…I can hardly stand them.” Sorry – It doesn’t work that way. If you love Him, the main way it is shown is by loving people. Especially your brothers and sisters in Christ.

Even though the Love of God be in you, It needs to be perfected. In other words, you still need to develop in it. We need to allow it to grow in us and dominate our thinking , speaking and actions. You can have this love in you and completely ignore it. You can quench it. You can yield to your temper and feelings instead – when all the while, the Love of God is on the inside endeavoring to influence you. It’s up to us what we let influence us. The Love of God or our carnal feelings, desires & emotions.

So – we as Christians are to be governed by the Love of God inside us and let it flow out of us to those around us. We shouldn’t operate out of prejudice, favoritism, or selfishness. Rather, we can be resources and examples of God’s love in our daily life and make a real difference for others.

I want to encourage you today to yield to God’s Love. It may be hard if you’re not used to submitting to it. The more you develop in it, the easier it will come.

How can you put this into practice this week?  Is there a specific person you can intentionally love?

Join the conversation & leave a comment.

Art

You have no choice? Really?

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I have noticed a problem plaguing young men today.  Many of them seem to be perpetual victims. They are suffering under some unseen hand that is keeping them down. They don’t know why but they just don’t ever seem to get a break. I know where they are coming from because I had that problem too.  I seemingly had no advantage. I wasn’t born into privilege or opportunity. I didn’t have a last name that opened doors for me and for a long time, I used these things as my excuses for why I wasn’t going anywhere.  All these reasons were not really my problem though. They were not where my limits were coming from.

I have no choice-Lie

Part of my problem was that I was a captive in my thinking and consequently in my saying.  Constantly saying things like It’s not my fault and I Can’t or What choice do I have? I am convinced today more than ever though, that I have no choice is a lie!

Pro 6:2  you are snared with the words of your mouth, you are taken with the words of your mouth. (Modern King James Version -MKJV).

Sure, today you may not have the choice to move to the neighborhood that you really want to live in, or drive the car you really want to drive, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t have that choice in your future. Here’s where we find a fork in the road.

Path number one is the path of continuing down the road you are on.  You are making only choices that drift in front of you, and hoping that someday an opportunity will float into your life. An opportunity that will change your life for the better in a big way.  This is wish mentality. Wish mentality leaves choice and opportunity in the hands of outside influences so that you are basically the victim of whatever comes along.

Path number two is the path of living on purpose. You may not have the power to make some choices today. But living on purpose, you can make intentional choices today that will create excellent choices in your future. You determine where you want to be, or are called to be, in your future. From there you begin to make strategic decisions that will take you there.

“Living on purpose, you can make intentional choices today that will create excellent choices in your future.”

I have chosen path number two.  Because I am a man of faith, getting vision & direction for my life start with prayer. The Bible says “Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths” (Prov 3:5,6).  While I will do research & get as informed as I can with my options, I lean to my heart when it comes to making decisions. If you have a relationship with the Lord Jesus, it is in your heart that He will lead you.

Proverbs 3:5,6  Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. (KJV)

Thank God, I am not where I used to be. I am no longer a victim, left to the whims of a life I have no control over. I can’t control everything, but I will control all that I can control and I will continue to make a future where good choices and opportunities show up in my life.

It was a choice that was mine alone to make. So it is with you. You don’t have to leave your life to just HAPPEN on it’s own. You also don’t have to turn over the reins to your life and let others take you where they want you to go. This is probably not where you would want to go anyway.

In order to get where YOU want to go, this path choice is a decision that only YOU can make. Truthfully, you and God are the ones who care the most, and have a vested interest in how your future unfolds.  Are you ready to take control of your life?

What’s one choice you can make this week to start you in the direction you want to go?  Share your answer in the comments.

For more content on choices, see Ruth Chang’s TED Talk entitled “How to make hard choices” by clicking here.  It’s about 14 minutes long but pretty well done.

Please share this post with others & help me expand the reach of this blog.

I appreciate you!