Kicking Discouragement To The Curb.

Some people don’t like you. I hope this newsflash didn’t just make you fall out of your chair, shocked with disbelief and unable to function. It however, is a very real fact, much like realizing that Santa Clause and the Easter Bunny aren’t real. Umm… Hopefully I didn’t just mess up your reality.

Kick discouragement to the curb

You are probably awesome in every way, multiplied by ten with a slice of pie on the side, but you are still not going to be everyone’s taste. There are people who don’t know you and have never had a conversation with you who do not like you and are not going to give you a chance. Then there are the people who do know you and still don’t like you. In spite of your stupendous & sparkling personality, some just won’t…and that’s okay.

“One reason why birds and horses are not unhappy is because they are not trying to impress other birds and horses.” ― Dale Carnegie

We all want to be liked…..by everyone. We don’t like being disliked. We sometimes get caught up playing this game of reading, interpreting and responding to the words & actions of others and constantly modify our behavior to either be viewed in a favorable light or at least avoid being judged. In reality, very few people are paying that much attention to us anyway. As Michael Hyatt likes to say, most people are tuned in to WWIFM. What’s In It For Me.

In reality, we have quite a bit of control over what others think of us. M. Farouk Radwan wrote “Before you encounter strangers, authority figures or important people don’t tell yourself “now I will know how they see me” but instead tell yourself “let me tell them who I am”.

I met someone a while back that I was really looking forward to meeting. I had heard good things about them and I liked them even before I met them. They did not respond to me the way I thought they would though. They started off and remained distant and cool. I poured on the charm, convinced that If they knew me better, surely they would like me. Nothing changed and eventually, I had to make a choice. Continue to change my behavior to please them in an effort to try to win them over, or push them to the sidelines in my life and continue to move forward doing what I know to do.

“Critic’s math. (1 insult + 1,000 compliments = 1 insult.)”.  -Jon Acuff

Do you know people who seem to always be seeking the approval of others? Constantly changing their behavior and laboring to be accepted. Being disliked creates anxiety in these people and provokes them to make choices, even choices they know are wrong, just to fit into the crowd. Scientific research has shown that fear of being judged has caused some people to intentionally choose the incorrect answer, knowing that it was incorrect, because everyone else did.

I am a Bible believing Christian, as I know many of my readers are. Making a stand for Christ has put us in line for persecution because of what we believe. Persecution is one of the things Jesus said we would have as long as we’re here. It’s the one promise that no believer really wants to receive. None the less, it’s so. I believe the Bible is God speaking to me. I believe the bible so strongly that I have made it the final authority in my life. Because of that, I study it and seek the Holy Spirit’s help to understand the heart of the Father more and more. My Christianity is not about a religious exercise. It’s about a relationship with God. I want to please him in all I think, say & do. Because of this, when it comes to my God, I have already “Picked my fight” so to speak. I have made my stand and I am fully committed to Him. Some may think I’m foolish or uninformed but that’s okay. I have already considered their words and have pushed them to the sidelines that I might continue to move forward and live by the convictions that He has put in my heart. Paul, the apostle said it this way :

Php 3:8 Yes truly, and I am ready to give up all things for the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord, which is more than all: for whom I have undergone the loss of all things, and to me they are less than nothing, so that I may have Christ as my reward, (BBE)

The reasons why people don’t like you, criticize you or harass you will vary. In some cases they are probably just being inconsiderate . Others may be intentionally trying to discourage you and shut you down. That was the case with the unbelieving Jews that paid their own way & followed Paul around persecuting him. They were trying to shut him up. Some even swore an oath that they wouldn’t eat until they killed him. That is outright devilish hatred.

“An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.”  ―Winston S. Churchill

You may have people out there who are not trying to add creative criticism to your life at all. They are actively trying to discourage you and to get you to disconnect from your focus. You have to push these critical voices to the sidelines. If certain people are only discouraging to you, then you will have to marginalize them in order to move forward. Don’t hate them or start running them down, gossiping about them or hating them back. Rather, pray for them. And rather than letting their harsh words take the wind out of your sails, just push them to the side. Make a decision that you will not allow them to discourage you and if possible, take steps to stop hearing their voices.

The stronger the stand you make for anything, the greater the opposition will be. People are allowed to have a dissenting opinion. In the Unites States they even have the right to free speech. But they don’t have the right to be heard. You do not have to listen. Just keep living consistent with your values and keep on stepping. One of the five regrets of the dying is the regret of not being more true to one’s self – (Ms. Bronnie Ware – The Next Web).   Living true to your convictions is too important to trade for the fickle approval of people who don’t really care about you.

“You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.”                      ― Winston S. Churchill

In his ebook “The Hater’s Handbook” Jon Acuff says it like this: Critic’s math. (Which is “1 insult + 1,000 compliments = 1 insult.”). Too many times we center in on the critical dissenting voice and ignore all of the wonderful people encouraging and cheering us on. Let’s you and I made a decision this week to marginalize the negative and discouraging voices and instead, focus on the ones who are encouraging us and helping us stay connected with our mission and purpose.

How have you dealt with and overcome criticism? Please join the conversation & leave a comment.

Marriage. Thriving, not just Surviving.

This last week my lovely wife Ann and I celebrated 25 years of marriage together. It’s hard to believe that it’s been one quarter of a century. Neither of us look like we could be more than just a couple of years out of high school. Well…at least that is true for her. I have a little too much gray in my beard. Anyway, We now have two adult daughters, 25 years full of memories and in some cases, hard learned lessons to show for it.

 Please join the discussion by leaving a comment.  Also, please share if you think this can help anyone else. I appreciate you!

Four Things You Should Know About Temptation.

I was recently encouraged by some dear friends to address the issue that men face concerning pornography.  I haven’t said much about it directly mainly because I was not sure how strong I wanted to be about it.  In the last ten days or so, I have been studying and reading quite a few statistics.  Covenant eyes recently released a report containing a lot of statistics about online pornography.  64% of Christian men view online pornography at least once a month.  15% of Christian women view pornography at least once a month.  To me, this is alarming.  While I think there are many Christians that are concerned for the direction of their country and are praying for their country, I think this may be hindering the prayers.

2Ch 7:14 If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.

We all face temptation in some form or another. It comes to every single one of us. Even Jesus faced temptation.  Now when any temptation shows up, it tells us a few things.

  1. The first is that we are dealing with something that we know is wrong and we know that we shouldn’t eat it, say it, do it or view it. The word Tempt comes from a Latin word that means “to try” as in “to be put on trial”. That tells us that the temptation doesn’t originate inside. It starts when you are put on trial. Think on that for a minute because it means that you are being baited from the outside.
  2. The second thing it tells us is that there’s something in us that wants to go forward into it, otherwise it wouldn’t be a temptation. There’s something on the inside of you that is attracted to the temptation. Now I want to stress something here. There are some people, who would look at a man being tempted to view pornography and condemn him for the temptation itself, but I have to stress this, temptation is not sin. It isn’t right for anyone to be persecuted or punished just because they are tempted. The Bible is very clear that even Jesus was tempted. The Bible says in Hebrews 4:15 that Jesus can understand and feel our weaknesses because He was tempted in ALL POINTS like as we are. It finishes the verse though by saying that He is yet without sin. That means that temptation is not a sin. Sin only happens when we yield to the temptation. When we “Enter” into it. It’s the yielding to it that’s the sin. Being tempted doesn’t mean you have failed or that you are a bad person.
    Dealing with what’s inside.
    External rules and restrictions may stop the manifestation of the problem but will not address the real issue. The real issue is a heart issue and a man doesn’t necessarily need pornography to sin. The sad truth is that our society offers a variety of visual triggers that can send a man’s imagination down the wrong path. That’s why the real change will need to come from inside. With the decision to change and the continual maintenance of the thought life – (See Rom 12:1-2). A person will find it a whole lot easier to resist when they are continually renewing their mind with the Word of God.
  3. There is a third thing that the presence of temptation tells us.  1 Corinthians 10:13 tells us: There is no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tested above that you are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that you may be able to bear it. That means that you are not alone in being tempted.  In fact, what you are experiencing is common to mankind.  There are boatloads of men who are dealing with the same thing.
  4. God didn’t intend for you to bear up under the temptation. He intended for you to escape it.  Think about Joseph for a minute.  Potiphar’s wife was hot for him and day after day she was throwing herself at him and day after day he refused.  One day he went in to the house to do business and everyone was gone but her.  She really put the pressure on him that day.  She grabbed him and began to really press him to have sex with her.  Joseph knew that at that moment, it was not time to set down on the edge of the bed and talk this thing out.  He RAN, and she held on to his coat, so he ran out of it and left it behind.
    When temptation comes, it’s important to not allow yourself to be deceived into thinking that you are stronger than you really are.  If you think this way, you will fall over and over and over again.  You have got to have an honest and humble estimation of yourself and realize that in order to stand, you sometimes need to flee.
    God is faithful and He will not allow you to be tested above what you are able. Many people do not believe this. They think that the temptation that they experience is an irresistible temptation. That can not be true. To say that is to say that God is not faithful.  This level of ability to resist and escape is not the same for every person though. Not everyone can resist and escape the same level of temptation.  Because of that, God does not allow certain temptations to come on certain people. He knows that they do not have the capacity to resist it.  That tells us something very important. If you are facing a temptation, it’s because you ARE ABLE to handle it, resist it, and escape it. God will not allow a temptation to come to you that would cause you to immediately cave under and fall. If a temptation shows up on your doorstep, it’s because God knows that you are mature enough to face it and win! You have inside you the grace that it takes to be victorious. That’s why when we fall, we are without excuse. Sadly though, too many people aren’t used to resisting at all when temptation comes. It’s not the standard operating procedure for most of us, but the simple truth is that really walking by faith is a walk of continually denying the flesh what it wants.  The flesh wants to freak out when things go wrong, or when you’ve stumbled, but walking by faith means “Holding fast to the profession of your faith without wavering, for He is faithful that promised” Heb 10:23.  When you need that profession of faith in your mouth the most is when you’ve fallen.

There is a lot to say about this and I want to talk in the coming weeks about practical ways to stand & not fall when it comes to temptation.  Let’s just consider this the beginning of the conversation.  I would love to hear your thoughts about this topic.  Please join the conversation & leave a comment.  Also, consider sharing this post if you found it helpful and know someone else who might be helped by it also.

Walls, Giants & Grasshoppers. The Lies That Hold Us Back.

 

“When you grow up, you tend to get told that the world is the way it is and your life is just to live your life inside the world, try not to bash into the walls too much, try to have a nice family, have fun, save a little money. That’s a very limited life. Life can be much broader, once you discover one simple fact, and that is that everything around you that you call life was made up by people that were no smarter than you. And you can change it, you can influence it, you can build your own things that other people can use. Once you learn that, you’ll never be the same again.

“The minute that you understand that you can poke life and actually something will, you know if you push in, something will pop out the other side, that you can change it, you can mold it. That’s maybe the most important thing. It’s to shake off this erroneous notion that life is there and you’re just gonna live in it, versus embrace it, change it, improve it, make your mark upon it.

“I think that’s very important and however you learn that, once you learn it, you’ll want to change life and make it better, cause it’s kind of messed up, in a lot of ways. Once you learn that, you’ll never be the same again.”   — Steve Jobs

I love this quote.  I find it very inspiring.  The truth is though, I was that guy.  I was living “inside” the life that I had, trying not to bump into the walls.  Not realizing that I had any control, that I could change things and make them happen instead of just letting them happen and responding to them.

K2 remove the limits

It reminds me of the verse in Acts 27 when during Paul’s voyage to Rome, the ship owner and the captain ignored Paul’s warning that they should not loose from the Fair Havens of Lasea, but instead launched out with a soft wind.  Not long after they were out at sea, they ran right into a typhoon.  When the winds were so strong that the ship wouldn’t respond to any attempt to steer it, the just turned it over to the wind.

And when the south wind blew softly, supposing that they had obtained their purpose, they weighed anchor and sailed along Crete, close in shore.  But after no long time there beat down from it a tempestuous wind, which is called Euraquilo: and when the ship was caught, and could not face the wind, we gave way to it, and were driven. – Act 27:13-15 

We gave way to it, and were driven!  If you continue reading they got to the point where they literally did not know where they were.  They were lost.  That’s what I did for many years, and I see people everywhere doing that with their lives today.  The truth is that God has a VERY, VERY BIG plan for your live.  It’s a life that Ephesians 2:10 says that God hand crafted you to live, and that it’s been waiting for you. It was “before ordained that you should walk in it”.  It’s a good life.  It’s the very best, and most fulfilling life you could possibly live.  We see from Ephesians 3:14-21 that part of our problem is that we have trouble comprehending the extent of the love that God has for us.  He wants us to know that He is able to do Exceeding Abundantly Above all that we ask or think when we allow Him to work in us.  The short of it is this…God wants to help us but we have a vision problem.

The sad truth is that God is not limited by His ability to help us, He’s limited by our ability to receive His help.  We are the limiting factor in whether or not God can move in our lives.  We receive by faith and faith is of the heart.  Our heart problems limit God in our lives.

We don’t see ourselves the way God sees us.  Consider this.  Remember the story in the Bible about when Moses sent the 12 spies into the promised land to spy it out?  They went into the promised land and surveyed it for 40 days.  They said:

“We went to the land where you sent us. It is a land filled with many good things! Here is some of the fruit that grows there. But the people living there are very powerful. The cities are very large and strongly defended. We even saw some Anakites there (Giants). Caleb told the people near Moses to be quiet. Then Caleb said, “We should go up and take that land for ourselves. We can easily take that land.” But the men who had gone with him said, “We cannot fight those people! They are much stronger than we are.” So those men gave a report that discouraged the people. They said, “The land we saw is full of strong people. They are strong enough to easily defeat anyone who goes there. We saw the giant Nephilim people there! (The descendants of Anak come from the Nephilim.) We felt like little grasshoppers. Yes, we were like grasshoppers to them!”   Num 13:27-33 ERV

Are you hearing that? Was what they said true?  For the last 400 years, someone else had designed their lives. Someone else who didn’t care about them but only wanted to use them and exploit them for their labor. God had led them into the wilderness for about two years at this point.  The Bible says that He did it to prove them.  Now God Almighty has led them right up to the land that He promised them and it’s finally here…It’s Go Time!  Time to believe God’s Word and move into the “Exceedingly Good Land”.  So – Was what they said true?  No!  and to prove it, 40 years later their children took the land!  After 40 years, the inhabitants of the land were the same, the walled cities were the same and the giants were still there.  But 40 years later all those things didn’t matter because the people believed God’s promise and didn’t allow the circumstances to stop them from moving forward.  They refused the limits and the lies. They proved it could be done.  The Grasshopper vision was gone!  God’s plan for them was soooo much more than anything they could have done for themselves.  It truly was Exceeding Abundantly Above all they could ask or think.

Jeff Goins writes in his book “The Art of Work” about the unlived life.  He writes about allowing yourself to become who you are supposed to be in order to be able to do what you are supposed to do.  So, I ask you today, there, looking down at my writing from your glowing screen.  Are you ready?  Are you ready to accept God’s call to you to live the life you were born to live?  Are you ready for the Exceeding Abundantly Above path for your life? Are you following your path and making your life happen instead of just “giving way to it and being driven”?

This is a prayer that Paul the Apostle prayed for the Colossian church.  It is a Holy Spirit inspired prayer.  I ask you to pray this over yourself every day.  Believe it knowing that God wants to do it in your life.

“Since the day we heard these things about you, we have continued praying for you. This is what we pray:

that God will make you completely sure of what he wants by giving you all the wisdom and spiritual understanding you need; 

that this will help you live in a way that brings honor to the Lord and pleases him in every way; that your life will produce good works of every kind and that you will grow in your knowledge of God; 

that God will strengthen you with his own great power, so that you will be patient and not give up when troubles come. Then you will be happy”   Col 1:9-11 ERV

 If you not sure about your relationship with God and you’re not sure of His willingness to help you, Please Click here.

Part 2 – Want To Give Up? Here’s What To Do Instead.

So how do we maintain our focus?

When we look at what God said to Joshua, we can see that the first thing that God told him to do was to get focused and to get obstinate about keeping focused. Then God told him where to focus. In Joshua 1:8 God told him “This book of the law shall not depart out of your mouth; but you shall meditate in it day and night, that you may observe to do according to all that is written therein: For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you shall have good success.”

brass loop focus

Pay close attention to the details here. Here we can see the key to renewing our mind as scripture instructs us in Romans 12:1 & 2. Here God’s promise is that we can make our way prosperous and have good success. There (Rom 12:2) the promise is that we can PROVE the good, acceptable & perfect will of God.

We really need to notice here that God is not just instructing him to read it continually. Joshua was instructed to SAY IT continually. “This book of the law shall not depart out of your mouth…” Rev. Mark Hankins said in quoting Kenneth E. Hagin that confession opens the door to the supernatural. Very often people will hear the truth and say “I believe that”. Mark Hankins said “it’s not enough to believe it! You’ve got to declare it if you want circumstances in your life to change”.

Remember in a previous post I talked about Deuteronomy 6:6-9 where the Lord commanded the Children of Israel.

(ISV)”Let these words that I’m commanding you today be always on your heart. 7 Teach them repeatedly to your children. Talk about them while sitting in your house or walking on the road, and as you lie down or get up. 8 Tie them as reminders on your forearm, bind them on your forehead, 9 and write them on the door frames of your house and on your gates.”

The truth that I keep driving at with this passage is it has to be in our mouth and it has to be repeatedly. It is the constant exposure to the Word of God that brings faith in God, and specific exposure brings faith in God for specific things. A good personal example would be that I thank God every day for bringing Col 1:9-11 to pass in my life and in the lives of my family.

Col 1:9 For this reason, since the day we heard about this, we have not stopped praying for you and asking that you may be filled with the full knowledge of God’s will with respect to all spiritual wisdom and understanding, 10 so that you might live in a manner worthy of the Lord and be fully pleasing to him as you bear fruit while doing all kinds of good things and growing in the full knowledge of God. 11 You are being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might, so that you might patiently endure everything with joy. (ISV).

We can actually pray this for the entire church and I sometimes do, but I pray this in first person, over myself continually, thanking God for making it true concerning me. Very specific promise for very specific faith. When we intentionally expose ourselves to the promises in God’s Word, we are allowing the Holy Spirit to guide us into all the truth (Jn 16:13) and to make the Word real to us.

In Matthew 16 Jesus asked His disciples who people were saying he was. They gave various answers but He then asked them who they (the disciples) say He was.  Simon said “You are the Christ. Son of the living God”. Jesus said “Blessed art thou, Simon Bar-Jonah: for flesh and blood hath not revealed it unto thee, but my Father who is in heaven. 18 And I also say unto thee, that thou art Peter, and upon this rock I will build my church; and the gates of Hades shall not prevail against it. 19 I will give unto thee the keys of the kingdom of heaven: and whatsoever thou shalt bind on earth shall be bound in heaven; and whatsoever thou shalt loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.” (ASV).

I left this in the American Standard Version because it says something specific that many of the paraphrase versions change. Jesus said that Simon was made firm and solid (Petros – [piece of] rock) by the understanding of the revelation from God that Jesus was the Christ, the son of the living God. Then Jesus goes on to say that on the (Petra – [mass of] rock), the revelation that He was the Christ, the son of the living God,  He was going to build His church. He then says that the Gates of Hades shall not prevail against it. Against what? Against that revelation. Jesus then says that he was giving the church the keys to the kingdom of Heaven and the right to bind and loose that would affect both earth and Heaven.  He gave His church the power to lock and unlock gates!

So lets put last week and this week together and summarize –

When your dream is being challenged, you are discouraged and close to giving up:

  1. Be strong and of a good courage. Remember, the Hebrew word translated Be Strong is “To fasten, fortify, strengthen”, and the definition of the word used here for Courage means “To be alert, steadfastly minded, obstinate”. Again, we can see that God was encouraging Joshua to become laser focused on the promise and to protect that focus.
  2. Meditate on the promises of God’s Word. Meditate is not just something you do with your mind. Meditate according to scripture is something you do with your mouth. It’s outlined in Deuteronomy 6:6-9 and in Joshua 1:8. This is where we learn what our focus should be.
  3. Stay in the Word until the Holy Spirit turns the light on. It’s when He brings light that real faith comes. Allow Him to make it real to you. It’s when this happens that you become solid and immovable concerning your focus. This is also where the keys come into play. When The Lord reveals your answer to what you’ve been praying for from the Word, then you now have a key that unlocks the gates of Hades. A locked gate can’t prevail against the key. You now have the God given power and wisdom to remove the bars that have been holding you back. Now is the time to open your mouth! Remember, Jesus said in Mark 11:23 “Verily I say unto you, Whosoever shall say unto this mountain, Be thou taken up and cast into the sea; and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that what he saith cometh to pass; he shall have it” (ASV). While believing is important, it needs to be mixed with saying.

Lets take a minute and put this into practice. Make this something you declare everyday for yourself.

Lord, I am your workmanship. I was created in Christ Jesus for a good work and you planned this work before the world was formed (Eph 2:10). I stand on your promise that you will guide me into all the truth, and so I know that you are leading me today. I thank you for it. I am so glad that you have created me with divine purpose and I have significance in the earth and my life has meaning. I commit myself to be available to be used to the utmost today and everyday. I will accomplish great things as I obey your plan for me. Thank you Lord for your love for me, your care for me and for the blood of Jesus that was shed so that I can enjoy this relationship with you. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

Want To Give Up? Here’s What To Do Instead.

While the argument can be made that we need adversity and challenge to live a fulfilled life, all of us have faced situations where it just seemed like the dream that God gave us would never come true. For some unseen reason, our heart’s desire was repeatedly denied. We struggle to get traction or maybe adversity made it look impossible and it seemed like the only thing that made sense was to just give up.

Don’t lose heart. Adversity is not the indicator that you are on the wrong path. Let me repeat that. Adversity is not the indicator that you are on the wrong path! If adversity was the litmus test as to whether or not we were in the will of God, we would have to say that Jesus was never in the will of God. He was constantly being tested and the scribes and the Pharisees were always trying to find a reason to kill him. THAT’S some serious adversity!

Focus image

About a month before I turned 18 I recommitted my life to Christ. This was the single most important decision that I have ever made. I went “All In” that day and it had been the governing influence on my life from then until now.

Not long after that a dream began to emerge in my heart. I wanted to go to Bible School and become a minister. I began to think about how cool it would be if I could just help & minister to people all the time. Of course, at the time, I was green as grass and didn’t know anything about the Bible or God. Even though there was a great desire, for some reason I could never seem to get my life put together enough to go to Bible school.

Over the next few years, I had a few false starts but still was never able to get the dream off the ground. I grew in my industry and had a pretty good job. I found my bride and we started a family together. I was involved and developing in our church. Things were good. I was able to help and minister to people sometimes…I was almost there, but not quite. Pastor Keith Moore says it this way, “If its not quite, its not right”. That was the situation with me. I still had this enormous pull in my heart that I couldn’t get away from.

Fast forward 20 years. Its the week between Christmas and New Years eve 2005 when the Lord made it known to me that it’s time. I didn’t hear an audible voice but I had a VERY strong assurance in my heart that it was now time to go to Bible school and I knew exactly where. The school that I was going to attend only admitted in the fall. They didn’t have mid year admittance at the time, so I knew that I had until August 2006 to get my business in order. I still didn’t know how I was going to do it but the Lord helped me to understand that If He’s calling me to do it, He’s also equipped me to do it. As the next several months unfolded, we uprooted our lives and moved to another state, I got a second shift job, we bought a home and I went back to school.  It all worked out amazingly.  It was true divine guidance.

While it sounds like an immense step to uproot your life and rebuild in an area where it appears that you have no contacts, family or support network, the right thing to do is to always obey. I will also add this comment. The safest place on earth in the will of God. What I’ve discovered about God’s will for your life is this. He will always work in you until you want it. He will not have you do anything that you are afraid of or that you are unequipped to do.

Consider Joshua in the Bible. Joshua, along with Caleb and 10 other men were sent into the Promised land across the Jordan river to spy it out and bring a report back to Moses. You can read the tragedy of what happened in Numbers 13 & 14.  The 10 spies brought back an evil report that caused the people’s hearts to melt. Joshua and Caleb brought back a good report and tried to stir the people up to believe the promise and move forward. The people believed the 10 spies and their evil report and actually wanted to stone Joshua and Caleb.

Here’s the thing. Joshua knew it was God’s plan for him to go into the promised land but the rebellion of the people put that promise off for a full 40 years. So for the next four decades Joshua serves Moses as they lead the people in the wilderness. Four decades of Promise Land Dreamin’ while wandering in the hot sun and sand.

When the time finally came, Moses had died and it was Joshua’s job to lead the children of Israel into the promised land. It was such a big deal for Joshua that the Lord encouraged him and said in Joshua 1:6 “Be strong and of a good courage”, in 1:7 “Be strong and very courageous” and in 1:9 “Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the LORD thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.” The Hebrew definition of the word translated “be strong” is: to fasten, fortify, strengthen. It paints a picture of laying hold of or grabbing and not letting go. Likewise, the definition of the word used here for “courage” means: Be alert. Steadfastly minded. Obstinate. We can see that God was encouraging Joshua to grab a hold of the promise and become stubborn about letting it go. To become laser focused on the promise and to protect that focus.

Joshua needed to hear that because of the massive job he had been handed and had to over-see. That is exactly what you need to do too. You need to go back to the beginning. Back to the promise that started you on your path, and then lock your focus on it. Become stubborn about it. When people are discouraged, its because they have been distracted. Don’t allow yourself to become distracted by things that have far less importance in your life.  Don’t be distracted by pressure, busyness or what seems like slow progress. Look how long it took me? Look how long it took Joshua.

I can say now as I look behind me that all that time that I thought I was just waiting, I was actually growing. The Lord led me to make my move when I was mature enough and had faith enough to do it. Had I jumped the gun, I could have messed up my life and possibly destroyed my marriage. My point is that God is on your side and He wants to bring you in to your promise. Don’t get impatient or become weary, just trust.

I have had to divide this post up because of length. I have a lot more to say but your time is valuable to me and I never want to take if for granted.

So what can you do this week to re-engage your focus? God has put a dream in your heart but you need to move toward it. Write the scripture promises concerning your dream on cards or post-it style notes and put them on your bathroom mirror and in your car so you can be constantly reminded of them. Read them and say them out-loud every day. Make them first person and put your name in them as you say them.

Scripture references: Deut 6. Josh 1:9. Mark 11:23,24. Heb 4:14 & 10:23.

The Priority of Fatherhood.

This week I was planning to make a video post and I set out Monday night to shoot it.  When I was done it was 24 minutes long.  Too long for a video blog post.  It’s funny how there are times when you really have to mine your heart for things to say and then there are times when you strike a live wire and the content just gushes out of you.  Monday night was like that one.  Anyway, I am in the process of editing it down into 4 or 5 video posts, and because of the time that the editing process takes (when you barely know what you’re doing), we will NOT be posting that video this week.  We’ll just wait & see how the editing goes.

Billy Graham quote on brown background

One of the joys of my life is talking with my daughters.  I absolutely love it when awesome conversations spontaneously break out and the next thing we know, an hour has gone by and we didn’t even miss it.  In times like these we sometimes talk about friends & boyfriends, while other times we talk about things like integrity, honor, humility & honesty.  Sometimes the conversation is about both, like people they know who have messed up lives because of the choices they’ve made.  One time I was talking to my eldest daughter & we were having one of those conversations.  I made a comment about what a particular friend should have done to avoid the fall-out from a bad decision. My daughter looked up at me and said “yeah, but they don’t have YOU for a dad”.  Her implication was that if I were this person’s dad, they probably wouldn’t have made the poor choice.  While it pleased me that my daughter said that, it also caused me to think.

My children have never had to face many of the struggles and suffering that I have faced, and that some of their friends are currently facing. I know that at least in part, it’s because they have parents who make them a priority and have made it a point to teach them Godly principles from an early age.  As I looked back over my life as a son and as a father, I began to see that, as a boy, the thing that mattered most to me about my parents was that I wanted them to be there.  As a father, one of my highest priorities is that I want to be there when my girls need me.  I want to be there even if they don’t need me.  I just like being around them.  Even if it’s just to talk about the drama at their workplace or what’s going on with their friends.  I need to be there for them.  They need me to be there.

What will they need from me tomorrow?  I don’t know.  We’ll see what tomorrow brings and I’ll do my absolute best to help them navigate it.  I told my daughter one time, “Don’t ever run from me.  When all the dust settles and everyone else has left you high and dry, I will be the one behind you helping you dig out of this hole”.  I can’t do that if I’m not there.  Fathers, If you don’t live with your kids, I’m not trying to condemn you, but while your kids need you to support them financially, what they need more than that is for you to be a strong part of their life for good.  So what’s the priority of Fatherhood?  Be there. Even if you don’t live with them, be a big positive part of their life. Even when they’ve grown up, make sure they know that you’re still there and still on their side.

God the Father demonstrates His own commitment toward us as our Heavenly Father in Deuteronomy 4:31, 31:6 and in Hebrews 13:5 when He says “I will never leave you, nor forsake you”.  That leaves us with a strong example of what fatherhood should look like, and it gives us a strong consolation that He will never leave us twisting in the wind.  We will never be out of his reach!  Wow! Thank you Father!

I challenge you to take it to the next level this week.  Make special effort to be with your children and do something memorable.  Intentionally teach them something that will help them down the road.

What are some things that you have done, or places you have gone, to have quality time with your kids?  Please share by leaving a comment.

Encouragement for My Single Friends

While praying the other day, the Lord brought to my remembrance something that a single friend had posted on Facebook a few years ago.  The remark was something like “I never thought I would be alone at this stage in my life”.

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Lets face it, some people are single because they want to be.  They just like it.  They like the freedom of it.  They like everything in their life and space to be just the way they want it.  That’s Okay.  A person who remains single can dedicate themselves fully to the path that the Lord wants for them to walk.  Paul the Apostle said by permission from the Holy Spirit :

1Co 7:6 But I speak this by permission, and not of commandment. For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that.  I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I.  But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.

Not everyone who finds themselves single wants to stay that way though.  For many, there is a longing to be in a relationship.  A strong desire to be half of a whole.  Committed and fulfilled.  Loving and being loved.  The reasons people find themselves single vary and only they and God know all of the reasons why.  Some may have started off in a relationship or a marriage and through tragedy or treachery, they find themselves forced into being alone.  Some may even feel like time is not on their side and that there is a race against the clock to try to find the right one.  I read and hear comments from some, and they wonder “Why haven’t I found someone yet?”  I want to take a minute today and just encourage you and to remind you of things you probably already know but may have lost sight of.

  1. Stop thinking about what you might be missing.  The truth is that the only thing you’re missing is the pain and torment of being in the wrong relationship.
    Trust God that you are not missing anything good and that all that is good about being in a relationship with the right person is being laid up in store for you.  You’re not missing out.  All of the good that you thought you were missing out on is just being deferred until later.
  2. Are you ready for it?  Are you ready for them?  Can a new person come into your life and stand on their own merits without being overshadowed by your past?  Maybe you haven’t been ready for a relationship.  Maybe you would actually be someone else’s torment.  Work on what you have control over.  You.  Become the best you that you can be.  Become the prize catch.  Trust God to work on the stuff you can’t control.  He knows exactly what makes you happy and He wants you to be happy.
  3. What are you seeking?  Jesus said in Matthew 6:33 (BBE) “But let your first care be for his kingdom and his righteousness; and all these other things will be given to you in addition.”  In this passage Jesus was talking specifically about physical needs, house, food & clothing but we see a bigger picture emerging.  He said in verse 31 “Then don’t be full of care…”  Then in verse 32 “Your Heavenly Father knows what you need”.  God cares about you, He has made provision to meet EVERY need that you have and the one thing he doesn’t want you doing is being FULL OF CARE (worried).  Trust that Your Heavenly Father knows what you have need of.

Ask God to help you.  Ask Him go grow you (both) up fast – to bring you (both) quickly to the place where you’re ready, and then bring you together.
Ask Him to deal with you bluntly,  and then commit yourself to hear….and to DO what you know to do.
Focus on you.  What do you bring to the table.  Don’t focus on them.  Stop looking at “What a real man/woman would do” and instead focus on you. You are all you will ever be able to control.  Focus on you.
Remember to keep God first.  There can only be one 1st place in your life.  Seek His kingdom first!  Then the other stuff will be added unto you.

Need to Make a Change? Start with Your Thoughts!

Most of us have things about us that we would like to change.  Most of us don’t give much thought to how.  Change happens when we change the way we think.  In this weeks video post I’ll talk about the need for change and also practical ways from the Bible to start change for the better in your own life.

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I would love to hear what you think.  Share your story.  How have you been able to make positive change in your own life?  Please join the conversation by clicking here.

God WANTS to help you!

Happy New Year! 

What a great time to start something new!  Right? Today we’re going to start something different.  Below is my first ever blog video, also known as Vlog.  It’s new for me so I would just ask that you forgive my “Hack n Slash” editing job.  I have been wanting to do video for some time now and have been quietly learning as much as I could about it. Most of my training has been from trial and error and also from the now famous “YouTube academy”.

Today’s topic is very close to my heart.  Many people need to hear God’s position concerning them.  My sincere prayer is that this will speak to you and strengthen your trust in God.  The scriptures used and some that were not used but are related will be posted below for you to look up for yourselves if you want.

 

Consider doing three things.

If this has helped you, please consider sharing.  Also, if you want to join the cool kids and not miss anything from artmills.org, consider subscribing to my email list.  When you do you will receive “Your Path and Your Provision” a short PDF teaching that will help you see the goodness of God toward you.

I want to hear from you!  Join the conversation.  I would love for you to share your own experience about the goodness of God.  Please share by leaving a comment.

Supporting scripture.

Pro 3:5-6 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.  In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

Mat 7:17-18 Even so, every good tree gives good fruit; but the bad tree gives evil fruit.  It is not possible for a good tree to give bad fruit, and a bad tree will not give good fruit.

Psa 115:16 The heavens are the Lord’s; but the earth he has given to the children of men.

Psa 100:5 For the Lord is good, and his mercy is never-ending; his faith is unchanging through all generations.

Psa 145:9 The Lord is good to all men; and his mercies are over all his works.

Psa 107:1 O give praise to the Lord, for he is good: for his mercy is unchanging for ever.

Psa 34:8 By experience you will see that the Lord is good; happy is the man who has faith in him.

Psa 33:5 His delight is in righteousness and wisdom; the earth is full of the mercy of the Lord.

Ezr 3:11 And they gave praise to the Lord, answering one another in their songs and saying, For he is good, for his mercy to Israel is eternal. And all the people gave a great cry of joy, when they gave praise to the Lord, because the base of the Lord’s house was put in place.

Here’s to a strong start for your 2015!

Your friend,

Art.