To be a good man, you need to bring good things to the table. Think about it. In dating, you may have high standards for what you are looking for in a woman, and that’s okay. You need to make sure that you’re meeting your own requirements first though. You need to be a man of equally high value. Why would you want to punish a woman for choosing you? You need to be a man worth having. To be worth having, you have to have a few things nailed down.
All friendships and relationships destined to grow and become meaningful need to start out with courtesy and manners. If a person doesn’t lead off with courtesy and manners, they are immediately making the road ahead unnecessarily difficult before they even walk it. While courtesy & manners are the basic minimum for any positive relationship to last, to have a truly meaningful and mutually fulfilling relationship, Godly love must become the center and the glue that holds all else together. A good man will have manners and be courteous, but a good man will also be a man of love.
From the Bible, the Greek word for this love is:
ἀγάπη agapē ag-ah’-pay. From G25 (Strong’s); love, that is, affection or benevolence; specifically (plural) a love feast: – (feast of) charity ([-ably]), dear, love.
In the Hebrew the word is:
חֵסֵד chêsêd kheh’-sed. From H2616 (Strong’s); kindness; by implication (towards God) piety; rarely (by opprobrium) reproof, or (subjectively) beauty: – favour, good deed (-liness, -ness), kindly, (loving-) kindness, merciful (kindness), mercy, pity.
True love brings all sorts of other things with it. Things like respect, faithfulness, honesty, integrity & kindness & mercy. To be a good man, you need to be a man of Love.
- Love God. Put Him first in your life. Make His path for your life your top priority. His path for you includes only good. His plan for you is the best possible life you could possibly have.
Loving God means also allowing God’s love to flow through you. You allow yourself to be a conduit through which the Love of God can flow. God loves people through you. Therefore, you love people with the love of God. - Love your wife. This applies to those who are already married. If you are not but plan on it one day, listen up. As a godly men, the Bible has shown us that we are to love our wives as Christ loved the Church. The very next sentence shows us how Christ loves the Church, He gave Himself for it (Eph 5:25-26). A husband shows love for his wife when he gives of himself to and for her. I also think it’s worth pointing out that when Jesus gave himself for the Church, he has never taken himself back. He will forever be our high priest. He will forever be our intercessor. He will never stop giving himself for us. If he ceased either one of these things, we would surely be lost.
- Love your brethren. Jesus said By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another (John 13:35). He then said This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you (John 15:12). While I think it’s important to walk in love toward those that are lost, Jesus specifically emphasized that the world would know that we are His disciples by the love we show one another. That’s a specific love to a specific group. Who? To the brethren. How? As I have loved you. How did he love us? John 15:13 says Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.
- Love those that are without. One of the lawyers trying to trip Jesus up asked Him a question. Master, which is the great commandment in the law? Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets (Mat 22:36-40). In this case, neighbor means near by. The one physically close to you. This is where we get the Golden Rule. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
When Jesus said that the greatest love is shown when a man lays down his life for his friends, It doesn’t necessarily just mean dying. Your life is measured by time. You can give your life by giving your time, and giving your time is a demonstration of love. Paul the Apostle wrote to the Corinthian church & said “I will very gladly spend and be spent for you; though the more abundantly I love you, the less I be loved.” (2 Cor 12:15). Spending and being spent are representing Paul’s resources, and Paul’s time. He equates them both with abundantly loving the people of the Corinthian church.
I want to challenge you this week. Could you use a tune up in the area of love? Take some time this week and spend it on someone you want to show love to. Make the time only about them. I’d love to hear the results.
I appreciate you guys!
Art