A short update from Art.

Hello to you!  I want to take a minute and just have a conversation with you, my beloved reader.  I really value our connection and I don’t take it lightly.  Because of that, I think I need to give you an update as to why my posting schedule has been a little erratic.  It’s basically comes down to me needing to take some time, and focus on getting some stuff done.  

Before Christmas I started on an ambitious woodworking project that I’m right in the middle of now.  

Here’s what I’m modeling after,

www.woodsmithplans.com

 

and here’s where my version is today.

Instead of tools, my version is going to be a cosmetics and make-up brush chest with a mirror in the lid.  🙂

We’ve also decided to replace the windows and siding on our house.  The windows were done last week, and we’re right in the middle of the siding part.  We needed this badly.  This house had been foreclosed on, and we purchased it from a bank.  When we took possession of it, there were no doors on, or in the house.  No light fixtures, vanity, water heater or air conditioning.  They had all been stripped by the previous owner.  All of the windows had been caulked closed and only one of them had a screen.    

After spending several intensive months on it, we’ve got a pretty good house. Except for the siding and windows.  But that’s all about to be fixed!  Yaay!

A couple of weeks ago, my uncle R.G. and his lovely wife, Marie came through and visited with us for a short weekend.  I was really blessed by it.  We broke bread together and stayed up kind of late just remembering funny stuff from the past.  We can’t get together for too long before we start encouraging one another in the Lord. I’m so glad and blessed that we had that time together.  

My uncle and I are pretty tight.  He’s been an active part of my life since I before I started the third grade.  Before that, we lived in different states.

When my parents divorced, I went through some pretty tough times personally.  My uncle took an interest in me and my life.  He loved me.  I say that as a verb.  He taught me, he helped me, he joked with me, he took me fishing, and most of all, he showed me the Love of God.  

He was the first Christian that didn’t make a big deal about my sin and mess ups.  He didn’t judge me. He just stayed steady, and would counsel me when the opportunity arose.  He stepped in when I didn’t have anyone to teach me how to be a man, and spoke to me about things like Honor, Integrity, Humility & Character.  Things that mattered.  

He actually set a good example to me of what these things look like.  The Lord used his example to birth in me a desire to help others this way. Especially young men.  

Anyway, I’ll do better at being more consistent with my posts, but I would like to ask you a favor.  Would you please send me a comment or email and give me three things that you would like me to touch on with this blog.  It would be a tremendous help to me.  I always make the topics a matter of prayer and I’ve been led by the Holy Spirit on much of what I’ve written about in the last three years, but I would like to sharpen my focus on the things that you really need to hear about.  

I sure would appreciate it.  I would like to borrow a comment from my friend, Pastor Bob Keich in closing and just say this – If no one has told you they love you today, let me be the first.  I love you guys.

Art

Do you have what it takes?

I read something on social media a while back where a young person was asking for someone to please be proud of him.  It got me thinking – a lot.  It saddened me that he felt that way, but the truth is, it is completely in his control.  

First, let’s look at the difference between I love you, and I’m proud of you.  

My love for you does not depend on how you act because it isn’t based on who you are, it’s based on who I am.  Love also can’t be taken, it can only be received. If it’s taken, it’s not real love, but something devious that we call manipulation.  Manipulation is the place where the selfish people play.  These will try to make you perform in order to be loved, but that’s not real. Real love must be given, not paid for.  It comes from the heart of love, and is demonstrated by giving.  This can be clearly seen in the famous Bible verse John 3:16.  

Joh 3:16  For God so loved the world that He gave His only-begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.

There’s a huge difference between I love you, and I’m proud of you.  I love you can exist on it’s own because it’s not really dependent on you.  It’s a decision made by someone else, and it’s based on what’s in their heart, not on you, or what you have done.

That being said, when someone says I’m proud of you, that is a way of saying that they are pleased with you.  Being pleased or displeased with someone doesn’t mean that you don’t love them.  It just means that they have done something you think is awesome or they’re doing things you don’t like.  Maybe they’re doing something that you are uncomfortable with. This is where some might get confused.  People can love others, but not want to be around them because of the way they act.

When someone tells you they are proud of you, or are pleased with you, they are telling you that YOU have done well.  Pride in yourself, or other people being pleased with you is based on YOU.  It comes from what you do or have done.  How you act is what matters here.  

Here’s a hard truth, and the faster you learn it, the better off you’ll be.  People don’t really care how you feel.  Seriously.  They don’t.  What they do care about is what you do.  

You have an unspoken agreement with everyone you interact with.  They may care how you feel, but they care far more what you do.  So much of what happens to you, or for you, is based on how you act.  

Does it seem like nothing goes your way?  Is it hard to get ahead?  Does it seem like you just can’t get a break?  When I hear people say stuff like this, the first thing I start looking at is how well do they take instruction and criticism.  What I usually find is that when people think they are struggling and can’t seem to get ahead, it’s usually true.  The reason it’s true though is because they won’t listen.  They can’t take criticism without getting their feelings hurt or getting angry, and they can’t take instruction because they act like they already know it all.  

When you’re arrogant, people don’t like dealing with you.  They will push you to the sidelines of their life and only deal with you when they have to.  

I know this from experience.  When I was 19, I was hard to get along with.  I had a very bad attitude.  I was arrogant, smart mouthed, and easily offended.  I was a real pill.  I had a friend that I worked with named Tim. Tim cared enough for me to pull me aside one day and tell me the truth. He said “People don’t like working with you.  If you don’t change your attitude, you’re going to get fired.”  The fact that he was there talking to me about this meant that it was the topic of conversation among my coworkers and my supervisor.  He was warning me.  

While it was extremely hard to hear, it cut straight through my bad attitude and hit me right in my heart.  It was apparent to me that my friend didn’t want me to get fired.  He wanted me to change, to do better, and he knew that I was burning my own bridge and my time was running out.  

Let me stop here and ask you a question.  What would you do if you were me?  Would you spout off something like “I don’t need this  #@!* job anyway!” and storm out?  I didn’t.  I wanted that job.  I immediately humbled myself and asked him to help me.  I submitted myself to his oversight and invited his criticism; both of which he faithfully gave.  It was hard, it was SO hard.  I don’t know about you but I don’t like hearing bad stuff about myself.  I want everyone to like me all the way, all the time.  

I began to realize something in that time that has helped me stay steady ever since.  We all would agree that none of us are perfect. Criticism is one of the most effective ways to identify areas where growth is needed, but we all resist criticism all the time.  Part of the reason is because when someone points out one of your faults, it may not be your fault that’s the issue.  Maybe they are the one who’s actually more wrong that you.  Another reason is that, even when someone is right about us and our faults, we think they are just judging, and we don’t consider them qualified to judge us.

If you can get over that, if you can learn to see correction and criticism for what it really is, you will grow & mature faster than you can imagine.  What correction really is, is someone taking the time to point out that you could be doing a little better.  To really grow, you will have to want it enough to endure the discomfort of being corrected.  You will need to humble yourself.

The bottom line is that, if you want people to be pleased with you (proud of you), you have to do things that earn it.  It’s not too late to start down this road.  You can begin today and build the man you want to be.  It starts with humility, and being able to be corrected.

Are you at a disadvantage?

Not too long ago, I heard a man talking about relationships.  He pointed out that because he was his father’s son, he was always able to go into the garage and use his dad’s tools.  Even when he became an adult and moved out of the house, he was still able to go over to his parents’ house whenever he needed to, and borrow a tool.  His point was that there were advantages to being the son, or daughter, that were not available to everyone else.

I know what it means to be a son, but I couldn’t relate to that whole garage story.  I didn’t have the advantage of a garage full of tools, and a dad who would let me borrow them.  I began to wonder.  What have I missed?  

Courtesy of stocksnap.io

I know of another young man who started a siding company.  This guy’s dad is a popular minister.  When the young man started his company, his dad leveraged his own influence & time to help his son promote the fledgling business.  I remember seeing the dad’s facebook posts, proudly talking about his son’s new business.  I would also see pictures posted of the dad standing at his son’s booth at a trade show, helping him promote it.  I think that is so cool.  

I wonder if these young men know what they have.  Compared to those of us who don’t have that kind of relationship with our dads, they certainly seem to have  an advantage.  

There have been many times in my life that I wished I had my dad with me, even if it was just to push me harder to man up.  There were many times when I noticed his absence and felt disadvantaged.  

Even now, the temptation is there to feel disadvantaged.   I have to keep reminding myself that it’s simply not true. There is no disadvantage when you know God.  His salvation is so great that it completely erases all disadvantage.  I believe the only reason we may feel disadvantaged is because we are getting supernatural help from our spiritual enemy.

I will say this though – Without God, the disadvantage is real.  It doesn’t take a missing father either. You could have an abusive father who’s there all the time.

Like the young man I mentioned above, some young men don’t want to follow in their father’s foot steps, but instead have the benefit of his influence to start their own enterprise.  That’s great too.

Joel Osteen is a tremendous example of someone who stepped into his father’s shoes, stayed true to the vision for Lakewood church, and has grown his church and his influence far beyond his father.  He has, by building on the legacy of John Osteen, continued the growth of the ministry, and he reaches millions more that just those that attend Lakewood.

Consider Joseph in the Bible. (Gen 37 – 41).  He was the great grandson of Abraham.  His dad was called Israel which means Prince of God.  He was heir to a tremendous covenant with Almighty God.  He had prophetic dreams.  His dad gave him a fancy coat.  Everything was just going awesome for him.  Then his brothers conspired to kill him.  Thankfully, they didn’t follow through but instead, sold him into slavery to the Ishmaelites.  There were many times in Joseph’s life where he had opportunity to think that he was disadvantaged.  His father’s influence was gone and he seemed to be alone.  There were probably many times that as a slave, and as a prisoner, he took a beating.  Think about it though.  He was never beyond the reach or the sight of the Almighty.  God knew exactly where he was.  Even as a slave and a prisoner, God didn’t forget about him and kept promoting him.

One day, there were only two people in all the land that knew that God had given Joseph supernatural wisdom, and used Joseph to interpret dreams.  The butler and the baker.  Within three days, one of them was dead (the baker).  Things really looked bleak for Joseph because when the butler was restored to his position, he forgot all about Joseph.  The day came though, where, in a single day, IN A SINGLE DAY – it went from one person knowing about Joseph, to everybody in the land knowing about Joseph.  That’s what I call promotion!

God was faithful to bring Joseph into his destiny, but Joseph had to be faithful even when it looked like things were only getting worse.  The promotion was from God, not Joseph, but the promotion would not have come had Joseph not been faithful when no one was watching. Even after his promotion, it was the favor that God had given him with the pharaoh, and his faithfulness to do the job that kept him there.  

It might seem to you that you are disadvantaged.  You have nothing going for you and everything is hard.  It may be true.  Through being prideful and hardening your heart, you may have damaged, or weakened relationships with others and now it seems like you are alone.  It doesn’t have to stay this way.  

God hasn’t forgotten about you. He knows where you are.  If you will draw near to Him, repent for your stubbornness and commit to do what He directs you to do in His word, He will get into your business and help you like He did for Joseph.  The very next step COULD be the first step in the right direction.  

I have a note on my cork board in my home office.  It’s a quote from Rev. Keith Moore.  It says “I don’t have to know anybody.  I don’t have to have any money.  I have faith in God, and faith in God is enough”.

When you have God, you are not disadvantaged.  Quite the opposite.  When you’re His, you have an extreme advantage!  You can do ALL THINGS through Christ which strengthens you.

How to get clarity & direction.

For many years I struggled with knowing what to do.  I usually ended up drifting. I would make the best choice of the opportunities that would float by me, but I had no idea what the future held.  I just hoped that it would be good and sometimes worried that it wouldn’t be.  Yes, I said worried.

Today I don’t believe in worry.  Worry is a form of fear, and fear is the opposite of faith.  We know by scripture that faith comes from hearing God’s Word continually.  I now know that when I’m tempted to worry now, I need more exposure to God’s promises.

I took some time off from Blogging this last month to spend some extra time praying and getting clarity regarding direction in 2017.  I put some of the things I’ve been thinking about in this video.  I pray you find it helpful.

So – Are you with me?  I would really like to hear from you.  What are you focusing on for the coming year?

If this video helps you at all, please share.

I sure do appreciate you all.

Art